James Comey is out here promoting his petty takedown of the president, A Higher Loyalty, and as such we are learning more about the former FBI director than we ever cared to know.
On Tuesday, during an appearance on Good Morning America, Comey noted that Cleveland Cavaliers forward LeBron James is a role model.
“I admire LeBron James,” Comey said in a live interview. “He’s about to find out I used to talk about him all over the FBI. He illustrates what the endless pursuit of excellence looks like.”
Comey not only acknowledged James as the “the best basketball player on earth today,” but also added that he might be the best basketball player of all time.
“Every offseason, I’ve read, he tries to find a part of his game to make better, which is crazy because he’s already better than everyone else,” Comey said. “It’s because he measures himself not against the others but against himself.”
This is where I’m going to need James “Superhead” Comey to take a step back from LeBron James the basketball god to LeBron James the social activist, who was a huge Hillary Clinton supporter, and surely not a fan of Comey’s. James even went so far as to introduce “President Hillary Clinton,” as he phrased it, during a rally in Cleveland.
But who can forget—and yes, it is my job to make sure that no one ever forgets—that with just 11 days to go in the race for president in 2016, Comey made the baffling decision to reopen the investigation into Clinton’s emails. Many, including her husband, former President Bill Clinton, believed that this move—along with Russian bots, Russian-sponsored Facebook ads and Russian money fueling the National Rifle Association—helped Donald Trump secure the White House.
“I used to say inside the FBI, this is a great organization, but it’s not good enough. It can never be good enough,” Comey said. “We have to find parts of our game to make better. Look at LeBron James.”
Wait, I haven’t done this since high school, but I’m going to see if I can channel LeBron James.
[Starts shaking furiously.]
Voice of LeBron James: Man, fuck Comey.
Comey is out here trying to sell a book now that he’s been axed from his position, and the real burn is that he got cut after helping Trump secure the office. Comey needs to quit while he’s behind and keep the great LeBron James’ name out of his mouth because the King doesn’t fuck with him.
I, of course, have no knowledge of whether or not the King truly fucks with Comey, but his political leanings and outspokenness on the right side of righteousness would lead one to believe that Bron-Bron doesn’t fuck with him. Also, see my telepathic channeling of James as further proof.