Illustration for article titled White House Defends Trumps Executive Time After Leaker Reveals Sir Nap-A-Lots Schedule
Photo: Win McNamee (Getty Images)

To hear the president tell it, he’s a hardworking commander-in-chief who would never take nap during “executive time” no matter what his aides tell the media. He was resting his eyes...and praying.


Look, a man needs time to meditate after a family size bucket of extra crispy KFC, two Filet o’ Fish and a 2-liter bottle of coke (and some Coca-Cola to wash it down). But he definitely wasn’t sleeping. Stable geniuses don’t need sleep!

Trump has reportedly been working hard to find the person who leaked to the public that nearly 65 percent of his day is filled with something called “executive time” in which no one knows exactly what the president is doing but they know he’s not to be bothered.


An Axios exclusive found that the president spent 300 hours since the midterm elections in November in executive time which is basically another way of saying that the president was chilling, watching Fox News, making prank calls to foreign leaders, and resting in his pull-out coffin.

According to Politico, the president launched an all-out attack White House trying to find the leaker, to no avail. And, because the leaker is bold AF and doesn’t give a shit about this sloth-like ways, they leaked the president’s most recent schedule (Feb. 4-7) and guess what? he’s still getting his “executive time” in.

White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders (also known by her rap name, “The Devil’s Mouthpiece”) defended the president personal nap time claiming that the “creative environment” helps “make him the most productive president in modern history.” She also noted that he’s working while he’s sleeping and he’s getting more done in his sleep than any other president has ever done!

On Sunday Trump took to Twitter to defend “executive play time.”


While the president’s day may be filled with playing with blocks, eating buckets of soggy KFC and solving four-piece puzzles, that doesn’t mean that he isn’t working. It’s just that even when he’s working we don’t really know what he’s doing.


In other news, the Trump administration’s Secretary of Education, Betsy DeVos, recently issued a memo instructing kindergarten teachers across America to allow kindergarten students one hour of “executive time,” preferably after they enjoy the “creative environment” at recess.

Senior Editor @ The Root, boxes outside my weight class, when they go low, you go lower.

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