Someone Stole Former NBA Player Charlie Villanueva’s Toilet and He’s Pissed

Tom Pennington/Getty Images
Tom Pennington/Getty Images

Someone has made off with former NBA player Charlie Villanueva’s toilet, and Villanueva swears that this isn’t a joke.

The former power forward, who last played for the Dallas Mavericks, took to Twitter to chart the whole shitty experience.


Oh, Charlie, the shit gets crazier.

I literally can’t make this shit up. I also never thought about this, but I think that this is a good place to mention it. Villanueva is 6 feet 11, and as such, I would imagine that he has specially designed toilets that allow him to sit his tall ass down ... you know what? Forget it.

Let me just add that I have taken out a toilet or two in my day, and while I’ve never stolen a toilet, I do know that this requires some forethought and a trash bag, not to mention tools and, I almost forgot: WHO THE FUCK STEALS A TOILET?


I never, bro. Never.

But really, bro, who steals a toilet?!

And that wasn’t it. Villanueva added that he lost more from his castle than just his throne:


While the Dallas Police Department seemed to be sleeping on the job, Twitter was there to try to help Villanueva solve the case.


Hours later, Villanueva was still pissed.


If you have any information as to where Villanueva’s toilet may be, please reach out to him on Twitter.

Senior Editor @ The Root, boxes outside my weight class, when they go low, you go lower.

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Not Enough Day Drinking

They must’ve been in his house for hours.

The logistics of stealing a toilet though. Do you take it as a single unit or do you split it into bowl and tank? Do you turn the water off and flush it a couple of time to empty the tank or just snatch the thing full and dump the water? Why that particular toilet? Was it a specific brand and model that’s highly valued on the black market?

I think we’re looking for professional plumbers who steal things as a side gig.