Photo: Win McNamee (Getty Images)

Arizona Sen. Jeff Flake has a thing he does, which I call “The Flake.” The Flake is when a senator from a conservative state, like say, Arizona, acts conflicted about heavy subject matter and pump fakes as if they are going to cross party lines, but in the end—always in the end—they vote some 90 percent of the time with their party.

Here are images of Jeff Flak in full Flake mode ... This is rivaled only by “shy brother.”

Photo: Win McNamee (Getty Images)
Photo: Chip Somodevilla (Getty Images)

I can’t tell you how many yahoos waded into my DMs and found me on Facebook just to call me all kinds of assholes when I noted in this story that Jeff Flake was a spineless shitheel.

Advertisement

I’m not new to Jeff Flake, I’m true to it.

I penned this piece in January about Sen. Flake’s flaming of the president on the Senate floor.

Advertisement

In this piece I wrote:

Flake announced earlier this year that he wouldn’t be seeking re-election and added that he plans to use his remaining time in Congress to speak out against the president when he believes it’s warranted.

While I respect Flake for going out with a bang, a quick look at his voting record proves that he and the president seem to be in lockstep more often than not.

First, Flake voted for every one of Trump’s Cabinet nominations, including the grossly unqualified Betsy DeVos as secretary of education. In fact, Flake voted for every Trump proposal from his first day in office until the issue of sanctions against Russia became a major point for the Arizona Republican. Flake voted to keep former President Barack Obama’s sanctions in place because of the country’s reported tampering in the 2016 elections.

Second, and arguably most important, Flake voted against a bill that provided billions of dollars in disaster relief for Puerto Rico. He also voted for the final version of the tax bill, which is essentially reparations for the top 1 percent, and voted to confirm Kirstjen Nielsen as the head of homeland security. If you’re wondering where you’ve heard that name before, Nielsen is the same woman who was on the receiving end of Sen. Cory Booker’s fade over her inability to remember whether the president used the term “shithole” when referring to black and brown countries.

Advertisement

So it’s not even remotely shocking that Flake is going to vote for embattled judge Brett Kavanaugh to become an associate justice on the Supreme Court. Flake is full of shit. He has been for a while. The only difference between Flake and other GOP members, like Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC), is that Flake pretends to give a shit.

He pretends because Flake likes the idea of being beloved while continuing to be a deplorable. If Sen. Flake was truly on the fence about Dr. Christine Blasey Ford’s testimony that Kavanaugh sexually assaulted her during high school, then nothing in that sham of an FBI investigation (which only included nine witness interviews) would’ve convinced him to vote in favor of Kavanaugh.

If Flake was truly conflicted he would’ve demanded that a true FBI investigation be conducted. The FBI investigation was so flimsy that Congress gave the investigation a full week and the investigation was finished and turned in by Wednesday. Have you ever had an assignment so easy that you turned it in early?

Advertisement

The investigation was such bullshit that witnesses who weren’t being interviewed by the FBI but had pertinent information resorted to submitting statements to Congress members and to the FBI’s website.

If Flake was really about that life, he would’ve demanded to be taken seriously, as he was in the most unique position of any of the undecided Republican congress members—he’s not seeking re-election. He could’ve voted “no” on Kavanaugh’s confirmation because he knows that this whole process has been a carefully orchestrated White House scheme to get a president-pardoning sympathetic judge on the highest court in the land. He could’ve burned the building on his way to retirement.

But instead, Jeff Flake “flaked” because that what he does.

At least he’s consistent. If you thought that Jeff Flake was going to save the world from the orange one in office than I’m curious as to what you’ve been watching. Jeff Flake has proven time and again that when all the chips are turned in you can bet no matter how sad he looks, or how conflicted he claims to be, that he’s still a member of the Grand Ole Party. And he always will be.