Sports
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Nike Donates Millions to Republicans While Making Billions From Kaepernick Endorsement
Nike did it. They took the glorious afro-ed Colin Kaepernick, the face of a movement against the killings of unarmed black men, women and children, and made him the face of their “Just Do It” campaign. It was a beautiful “fuck you” to the NFL, who essentially whiteballed the former San Francisco 49ers quarterback from…
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Former ESPN Anchor Jemele Hill to Narrate LeBron James’ Basketball Documentary Shut Up and Dribble
Well, that didn’t take long. One of the realest to ever talk about sports, a must-follow on Twitter, and newly liberated fuckboy uncoverer, Jemele Hill, had barely stepped her foot off of ESPN’s campus before it was announced that her next gig will be narrating LeBron James’ basketball documentary Shut Up and Dribble. The documentary,…
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Texas School Superintendent: You Can't Count on Black Quarterbacks, but I Don't Mean That in a Racist Way
An East Texas school superintendent knows about the history and genetic makeup of black NFL quarterbacks but doesn’t know how to use Facebook. Lynn Redden is superintendent of the Onalaska Independent School District in the Piney Woods, about 75 miles north of Houston. Lynn Redden is also a fucking idiot. Redden decided that he had…
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Vontae Davis, the Buffalo Bills Cornerback Who Retired at Halftime, Is All of Us
When I was little I never understood why my mom took baths. We had a shower but she always preferred to spend an extra hour drawing a bath and bathing. My two sisters and I always wondered why she would always lock herself in the bathroom. I recently had a son. I take baths now.…
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A Week 2 Roundup of NFL Players Who Protested Police Brutality During The National Anthem
Recently Botham Jean, a 26-year-old black man, was in his Dallas apartment doing whatever the fuck he wanted to do because he was in his own apartment, when a white female police officer came to his door and killed him. This is exactly why the NFL players are protesting. So, tell me again why the…
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Watch: Boxer Adrien Broner Continues Quest to Become Undisputed Champion of Assholes
Adrien Broner was once a promising boxer with an oversized personality, now he’s just a mid-level boxer and a world-class asshole. The one-time, self-proclaimed heir to the vacancy left when Floyd Mayweather retired has now been banned from Uber for life after he and some friends harassed and terrorized a driver to Travis Scott featuring…
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10 Days After Wypipo Burned Their 'Winn Dixie 5s', Nike Stock is Soaring
Remember about ten days ago when all the white people who ever white peopled were so mad they started burning their “White Privilege 4s” and “Speak to Your Manager 8s” after learning that Colin Kaepernick, the face of the NFL player protest was also hired to become the face of Nike’s “Just Do It” 30th…
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Cowboys Owner Jerry Jones and Wide Receiver Dez Bryant Had a Date Night With Beyoncé and Jay-Z
Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry “Toes on the Line” Jones and former Cowboys wide receiver Dez “Burner Account” Bryant appear to have made up while enjoying the performance of another power couple. A photo of Bryant and Jones is going viral and it reportedly shows the two enjoying Beyoncè and Jay Z’s On The Run II…
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The Shook Ones: Umpires Reportedly Considering Boycott of Serena Williams' Matches
In the wake of Saturday’s U.S. Open finals debacle, in which Serena Williams demanded an apology from umpire Carlos Ramos after what she saw as an unfair call (and was subsequently punished for doing so), tennis umpires are reportedly considering collective action, including a boycott of Williams’ future matches. Two reports coming from out of…
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Marshawn Lynch Looked Like a State Farm Agent in High School, and the Internet Got Jokes
Looks like Marshawn Lynch wasn’t always the stone-faced, strong, running back who’s just here so he won’t get fined. In high school, Marshawn Lynch looked like the black guy on a Canadian teen show that was partly sponsored by the school district to teach kids how to say no to drugs and not have sex…