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As If Boiled Meat Wasn’t Bad Enough, Trump’s Campaign Seasoned the Season With a Website Full of Lies
President Trump has been a joke since taking office. He’s consistently outmatched and outwitted when sitting with heads of state; he lies so much that it’s hard to decipher what’s true and what isn’t, and he reportedly tried to park a truck with big tires on the White House lawn. So it’s unclear whether a…
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Republican Gets Spine for Christmas, Finds That Mitch McConnell Is Shady AF
In news that can only be described as shocking, Alaska Sen. Lisa Murkowski told an Anchorage TV station that she’s “disturbed” by Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell’s (R-Ky.) admission that he’s already decided his position on Trump’s impeachment. McConnell, the result of a turtle falling in love with a boat shoe and having unprotected sex,…
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Kwanzaa Is Dame Dash to Jay-Z’s Christmas
There was a time back when Kwanzaa and Christmas were cruising on a yacht popping Cristal and truly Big Pimpin’. Then there was a feud, something about Christmas cozying up with Lyor Cohen or Kwanzaa promoting Cam’ron to the president of Holiday Records, and Christmas bounced, went on to marry Beyoncé and partnered with the NFL.…
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Disgraced President Invited Disgraced Navy Seal to Disgraced Mar-a-Lago
The president, much like his Mar-a-Lago resort in Florida, is a shithole. So I guess it shouldn’t be shocking, but for some reason, it still is, that President Trump invited retired disgraced Navy SEAL Eddie Gallagher to Mar-a-Lago over the weekend to allow Gallagher to kiss his ring in person. “Finally got to thank the…
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President Quid Pro Quo Totally Quid Pro Quo’d All Over Ukraine and Here’s More Proof
Well, it turns out that the President of the United States is a liar. Who knew? So, the “perfect” phone call (as the president describes it) that President Trump had with the Ukrainian president Vlodmort Vikingface (seriously, who cares what this guy’s name is?) in which Trump was dangling Ukrainian aid in exchange for an…
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After Christianity Today Slams Trump, the President Attacks Entertainment Tonight
The only way that President Trump knows his ass from his hand is because South Carolina Sen. Lindsey Graham and Florida Rep. Matt Gaetz aren’t crammed up his arm. Other than that, the odds are pretty low that, at any given moment, the president has any fucking clue what’s going on. So on Friday, the…
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Kellyanne Conway’s Husband Has a Brutal Nickname for Trump and It’s Perfect
I don’t spend time thinking much about counselor to the president Kellyanne Conway and her husband George Conway’s relationship but whenever I do, I have a few thoughts: How long has Kellyanne been part of the undead? How does George list Kellyanne on their taxes and can you file jointly if one person is dead?…
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Trump Calls Impeachment a ‘Hoax’. Remains Impeached
At this point, Trump can call the impeachment proceedings anything he wants, but it isn’t going to stop the inevitable. After meeting turncoat New Jersey Rep. Jeff Van Drew, who voted against Trump’s impeachment as a Democrat and then switched to the Republican Party, Trump called the House’s vote to impeach his ass a “hoax”…
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Rudy Giuliani: I Got All the Dirt on the Bidens! Lindsey Graham: That’s Crap
Trump’s personal lawyer Rudy Giuliani, aka the real-life Saul Goodman, disappeared during Trump’s impeachment proceedings only to reappear in Ukraine earlier this month, which everyone called bizarre. And then we learned that he was there on official Giuliani business, which means that he was being smarmy AF and was openly trying to find dirt on…
