Much like her daughters, my mama is always here for some good eye candy. Whenever she sees a particularly attractive man, she refers to him as a “stud muffin,” and it cracks me up every time.
So, I immediately thought of her when I realized the reason “Morris Chestnut” was trending on Twitter Wednesday.
It all started with comedian Mel Mitchell bringing the following delightful joy to the timeline:
“They do not make niggas this fine no more dawg,” Mitchell tweeted on Wednesday, captioning a still shot of Chestnut. “I’ve looked. They not at brunch. They not at church. They not at the club. They not at Publix. Nowhere.”
Not even in a house; not even with a mouse; you cannot, will not find that type of Morris Chestnut fine, damn! Morris leads with smoothness. Morris is a velvet vision. Morris makes you want to say “it don’t make no goddamn sense to be that fine!”
In fact, when I think of Morris, it’s like the words “fine” or “handsome” doesn’t even quite work well enough. The perfect word for his level of good looks is best described by his own character in Two Can Play That Game: debonair. (Editor’s note: Morris Chestnut really is one of Gen X’s Billy Dees, isn’t he?)
There’s one scene in the film with Anthony Anderson (Tony) where Morris’ Keith gives a play-by-play on what happened the night he “transferred energy” away from Vivica A. Fox’s Shante in his favor. It went a little something like this:
Keith: I got over there about 10:00...all dressed up, looking good and suave and...debonair.
Tony: Like Denzel?
Keith: Better than Denzel.
That’s quite a claim, fictional Morris!
Mitchell’s tweet made me wonder, though—do they (they, meaning the Fine Ass Nigga Factory) make them like him anymore? Is there a specific type of Black-ass actor that’s poppin’ right now who you’d put under the “Morris Chestnut Fine” category?
I immediately thought of Yahya Abdul-Mateen II (Editor’s note: Yessir), but also wanted The Root Staff to weigh in.
For The Root’s Freelance Contributor Ishena Robinson, it’s Mahershala Ali. Actually, she typed this exact word, in this exact style: “MAHERSHALA,” in about .00002 seconds after I sent the question to the team.
I mean, did she lie?
The Glow Up’s Managing Editor Maiysha Kai went for Chiwetel Ejiofor (who could read a phone book and keep me enraptured) and suggests that for a younger demo, Kofi Siriboe is a lock (though, to be fair, y’all remember the way Jada Pinkett Smith was staring at him in Girls Trip!) She also threw in the funniest addendum I read today: “Commoners will say Idris [Elba].”
Then, Maiysha threw in another whammy, “OOH TREVANTE [RHODES]!” Listen, he practically reinvented Calvin Klein underwear ads as soon as he decided to don a pair for the world, by the grace of God.
Maiysha not only won with her array of answers, but she won at life because the very topic of this blog, Morris Thee Chestnut, is following her on Twitter. Mic dropped; glowed up. (Editor’s note: I still get a tingle just thinking about it.)
Now, the floor is yours: What popular Black actor of today would you say is “Morris Chestnut Fine?” Do they make Morris Chestnuts anymore? Let’s obey our thirst in the comments...