Trump Couldn’t be Briefed on America Because He Was Too Busy Asking About Badgers: ‘Are They Mean to People?’

Former White House Chief of Staff Reince Priebus and President Trump.
Former White House Chief of Staff Reince Priebus and President Trump.
Photo: MANDEL NGAN (Getty Images)

The President of Highlights children’s magazine couldn’t even be briefed by his then-White House chief of staff Reince Priebus because every time he saw Reince (whose name I always read as “Penis”), he couldn’t stop himself from asking him about badgers.


See, Penis Priebus (which would officially make his initials P.P. yep, I’m 7) is from Wisconsin, the home of the badger, which is also their state animal, and as such, Trump obviously assumed that Penis was his on-staff badger aficionado.

According to Business Insider, a new book called Sinking In the Swamp notes that Trump would interrupt meetings to ask P.P. if badgers were mean or if he kept photos of them and how badgers worked. Like, do they have a 401(k)? Health benefits? Childcare?

Daily Beast reporters Lachlan Markay and Asawin Suebsaeng, who wrote the book, claim that Trump became obsessed with Penis, Wisconsin and badgers, often wasting P.P.’s time with random fucking questions about badgers.

“After Trump was reminded that the short-legged omnivore was practically synonymous with the Badger State, he’d make a point of bringing it up at seemingly random occasions to his beleaguered chief of staff,” the book asserts, Inquisitr reports.

Trump wanted to know what kind of personality badgers had and if they were “boring.” He wanted to know if they were dangerous since they seemed to have sharp claws, and what they like to eat.

“‘Are they mean to people?’ Trump at least twice asked Priebus in the opening months of his presidency,” the book reveals. “‘Or are they friendly creatures?’”


Trump’s dumb-ass badger questions reportedly annoyed the fuck out of the staff, who were there to brief him on important shit.

“An obviously enthralled president would stare at Priebus as the aide struggled for sufficiently placating answers,” they added, “all the while trying to gently veer the conversation back to whether we were going to do a troop surge in Afghanistan or strip millions of Americans of healthcare coverage,” Inquisitr reports.


The only badger The Root respects:

Senior Editor @ The Root, boxes outside my weight class, when they go low, you go lower.


Babylon System

AG BARR (Trumps no. 1 bootlicker) is on TV pretending he has a spine saying “He won’t be bullied or influenced” (LOLOLO!) and CNN is eating up the lies.

What Barr is really saying is: “Stop tweeting our evil plans and just send me an encrypted WhatsApp message of what you need me to do, bro.”