Thank You Black Baby Jesus, Hillary Clinton Isn't Running For President in 2020

Photo: Pablo Martinez Monsivais (Getty Images)

The former secretary of state and first lady who couldn’t beat a lying orange bag of afterbirth in her second run for the White House will spare us the show that is the Hillary Clinton campaign and stand down in the 2020 election.

“I’m not running,” Clinton told News 12. “But I’m going to keep on working and speaking and standing up for what I believe.”

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Yes, keep standing up for what you believe in Mrs. Clinton, just as long as you don’t stand up and declare that you are running a third time for president. We’ve not forgotten your “bring them to heel” statements made about young black men or the racist undertones against Barack Obama during the 2008 run for president.

Maybe some have forgotten, so let me remind you.

From The Week:

It started in February, when Louis Farrakhan, the head of the Nation of Islam, endorsed Obama in a sermon. In a debate a couple days later, moderator Tim Russert repeatedly pressed Obama on the issue, who responded with repeated reassurances that he did not ask for the endorsement, did not accept it, and in fact was not a deranged anti-Semite. That wasn’t enough for Clinton, who demanded that Obama “denounce” Farrakhan, which he did.

About the same time, a picture of Obama in traditional Somali garb (from an official trip) then appeared on the Drudge Report, and Matt Drudge claimed he got it from the Clinton campaign. After stonewalling on the origin question, the campaign later claimed it had nothing to do with it. A Clinton flack then went on MSNBC and argued that Obama should not be ashamed to appear in “his native clothing, in the clothing of his country.”

Later, a media firestorm blew up when it was discovered that Obama’s Chicago pastor Jeremiah Wright once delivered a sermon containing the words “God damn America.” In response, Obama gave a deft, nuanced speech on racial issues, but Clinton kept the issue alive by insisting she would have long ago denounced the man.

And let’s no forget that Bill’s strategy during his wife’s unsuccessful bid as the Democratic nominee in 2008 was to compare Obama to Jesse Jackson’s run for the White House. Now, out of all the people who’ve ran for the White House, I wonder why Bill chose old Jesse to compare to Barack Obama?

Yes, Mrs. Clinton was “the first woman to win a major-party nomination for president,” but she “remains a complicated figure for the Democratic Party as both a trailblazing female leader and also the candidate who was defeated by Mr. Trump,” The New York Times reports.

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Clinton is trying to act like she’s always been adamant that she was not running for president, but that’s bullshit. She’s been playing coy and acting as if she hadn’t ruled it out, but I guess reality has finally set in.

The Times reports that Clinton has held private meetings with several “current and potential presidential candidates, including Senator Kamala Harris and former Vice President Joseph R. Biden Jr., as they sought counsel from her even before she formally ruled out another run.”

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“I want to be sure that people understand I’m going to keep speaking out,” Clinton, 71 said. “I’m not going anywhere.”

She laughed at the idea of running for another office, like say mayor of New York. “Oh, I don’t think so,” she said.

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Let’s just hope it stays that way. Now, has anyone talked with Bernie Sanders about possibly stepping his old ass down?

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About the author

Stephen A. Crockett Jr.

Senior Editor @ The Root, boxes outside my weight class, when they go low, you go lower.