trump
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Michael Cohen Breaks Up With Trump and Makes It Social-Media Official
The love affair between President Trump and his longtime lawyer and personal fixer Michael Cohen is over and it’s social-media official now that dirtbag Cohen has scrubbed all mention of his longtime lover client. According to HuffPost, Cohen—the man who once boasted that he would take a bullet for the president—has removed all mention of…
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2 Birds, 1 Racist President: Trump to Undo Obama Policy That Used Race as Factor for Diversity in Schools
In continuing with the White House’s theme on hating people of color while simultaneously undoing the legacy of former president of the United States and current president of Wakanda, Barack Obama, the Trump administration will rescind policies that included using race as a factor in achieving diversity in schools. “The Justice Department will scrap seven…
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Sarah Huckabee Sanders Continues Her White-Tears Tour Despite Being Satan's Mouthpiece
White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders, aka Suckabee, is still drinking the White House Kool-Aid—the special blend of indignant righteous and aloof ramblings that allows for unfathomable levels of heartlessness. On Tuesday, Suckabee had the audacity to claim that she would be a hypocrite if she didn’t treat everybody with respect since that’s the…
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Michael Cohen to Trump: I'm Ready to Flip Like the Last Black-Owned Home in a Gentrified Neighborhood
On Monday, depending on what you believe, President Donald Trump’s longtime personal fixer Michael Cohen is either ready to flip like Simone Biles doing an Olympic floor routine or he’s still sending smoke signals to Trump to pay for his attorneys if he doesn’t want him to sing like Rufus featuring Chaka Khan. Cohen told…
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Judge of Characters: We Gotta Be Civil to These Supremacists for What?
Why is it an issue of civility when Auntie Maxine Waters says this to a crowd of people: Let’s make sure we show up wherever we have to show up. And if you see anybody from that Cabinet in a restaurant, in a department store, at a gasoline station, you get out and you create…
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Obama Told Trump How to Fix Health Care: Just Name It Something Else and Take Credit for It
On Thursday, the former president of the United States and current president of Wakanda, Barack Obama, told a Los Angeles crowd of donors that he gave Donald Trump a brilliant idea on how to revamp his health care plan instead of repealing it: Simply name it something else and take credit for its successes. According…
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Trump Couldn’t Let Beyoncé and Jay-Z Live, Announces Summit With Russian President Vladimir Putin
Since the release of Beyoncé and Jay-Z’s surprise joint album, Everything Is Love, President Donald Trump and his staff have been working furiously to try to upstage the duo. Well, it looks as if the Trump administration may have finally decided that the one move that might take some of the shine from the Carters…
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God’s Favorite Intern, the One Who Cursed at the President, Is Suspended
During President Donald Trump’s visit to the Capitol last week, an intern for Sen. Maggie Hassan (D-N.H.) shouted, “Mr. President, fuck you!” and God smiled. Unfortunately, as an intern, you cannot shout such things, and Hassan’s staff has suspended the courageous young woman for a week and will limit her access in the Capitol for…
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Atlanta Mayor Sends Message to Trump That She Won’t Allow ICE Detainees to Be Housed in City’s Jails
On Wednesday, newly elected Atlanta Mayor Keisha Lance Bottoms announced that she is no longer allowing city jails to accept detainees from U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement. On the same day that the president signed an executive order that would stop the separation of children from their loved ones at the U.S. border, Bottoms signed…
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Was That Boston Celtics Great Kevin McHale at a Trump Rally? Don’t Know, but His Wife Is Totally Trump Crazy
I’m not sure if it was Boston Celtics fans or their archnemeses, Los Angeles Lakers fans, but somehow, some way, somebody spotted someone who looked exactly like legendary Celtics power forward and NBA Hall of Famer Kevin McHale in the sea of whiteness that was President Donald Trump’s rally in Duluth, Minn., on Wednesday. And…