president
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Nancy Pelosi Questions Trump’s Manhood. Presidential Rage-Tweeting to Begin in 3… 2… 1…
House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-Calif.) and Senate Minority Leader Charles E. Schumer (D-N.Y.) are done attempting to play nice with the president. Come January, the Democrats will run the House and much like Kid and Play in the seminal classics House Party 1, 2, and yes, 3, they are about to dance battle all…
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No One Wants to be Trump's Chief of Staff Because the Job Sucks
As it turns out, the emperor has no clothes and no chief of staff because no one wants that miserable-ass job of being the Spliff Starr to the president’s Busta Rhymes. John F. Kelly bounced on the president’s ass mostly because he didn’t know that the chief of staff job meant changing the executive television…
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The President Lies So Much The Washington Post Invented a New Rating for His Mistruths
The president of people who enjoyed LL Cool J’s verse on Accidental Racist lies so much that Washington Post fact-checker Glenn Kessler has had to introduce a new rating called the “the Bottomless Pinocchio” for politicians like Trump “who repeat a false claim so many times that they are, in effect, engaging in campaigns of disinformation.”…
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It's Official: The President Is an Idiot and This Tweet Is The 'Smocking' Gun
President Donald J. Trump is a signed, card-carrying rage tweeter. Normally, when he’s rage tweeting about the Russia investigation, it’s easy to look past his grammar because it’s amusing to see him folding under the pressure of the investigation in real time. But early Monday morning, before the president donned his kaftan made from the hides…
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Trump National Golf Club Maid Comes Out As Undocumented, Surprisingly Hasn’t Killed Anyone
President Clark Griswald would have white midwesterners believe that he’s the tough-on-borders president, minus, of course, his genius immigrant wife and her parents. He would have southern whites believing that he’s the build-a-wall president that’s going to keep migrants from coming into the country and stealing all the good jobs. He would like to have…
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Real White Housewives Episode Recap: Trump Wants Former Fixer Michael Cohen In All the Prisons
On the last episode of the Real White Housewives the president’s former fixer Michael Cohen, whose tagline is “Go get you some hot water, cause you know I’ve got all the tea!” had agreed to cooperate in special prosecutor Robert Mueller’s investigation into all things Russia. Live footage of Cohen flipping: President Trump, whose tagline…
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Michelle Obama Still Doesn't Want to Be President but That Doesn't Mean We Should Stop Trying
Despite consistently saying that she has no interest in running for president, Michelle Obama has once again confirmed that she doesn’t want to be president. But I, like the rest of us, am not trying to hear that. We need you, Michelle! And while we know that she has no interest in running the country,…
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President Petty Goes Back to Reality Show Roots and Threatens to Release Receipts on Democrats
The president of the United States is threatening to do all kinds of unpresidential shit because he’s the president of the goddamn United States! In an interview with the New York Post, the president of the fucking United States of America just said that if House Democrats use their power to demand to see how…
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Trump Is Rage Tweeting Again, Which Means the Russian Walls Are Closing In
Over the course of one of the worst administrations in the history of the United States, we’ve all learned one thing: Whenever President Trump starts rage tweeting something is going right for the world and drastically wrong for him. On Monday, the president called out special counsel Robert Mueller and the investigation into the obvious…