When New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie confronts you while holding nachos, you sweep the nachos! You can’t, under any circumstances, hit the governor of New Jersey, especially when he has armed guards with him, but nothing says that you can’t sweep the nachos when he gets all up in your face.
Because Christie spends almost as much time vacationing as President Von Douche Face, he was at a Chicago Cubs game against the Milwaukee Brewers Sunday when a fan called him out for being a deplorable. Someone recorded the encounter, which shows Christie getting in the face of the fan while holding a brand-new batch of nachos covered in cheese.
“You’re a big shot,” Christie tells the fan as he walks away with his container of nachos, ABC News reports.
“Appreciate that,” the fan, identified by WISN as Brad Joseph, replies.
Joseph said the ruckus started after he yelled, “Christie, you suck!”
“I called him a hypocrite because I thought it needed to be said. He then turned around and walked all the way back toward me and got up in my face for what seemed like a long time but was probably only about 30 seconds,” Joseph said.
“Why don’t you have another beer,” Christie told Joseph.
And this is the part where Joseph should have swept the nachos. Christie came over and put his FUPA all up in Joseph’s face. No man ever wants uninvited man FUPA all up in his face. Ever.
“Which I thought was a decent comeback, and I thought that was kind of funny,” Joseph said. “Then he started calling me a tough guy.”
Explainer: “tough guy” is non-tough-guy language. It’s usually said before a white-on-white scuffle. See also: “big shot.”
Joseph told the news station that because he lives in America and didn’t say anything vulgar, he had a right to express his feelings about a public official.
“This is America, and I think we have the right to say what you believe as long as it’s not crude or profane,” Joseph said.
ABC News reports that Joseph was at the park with his friend, WISN reporter Ben Hutchinson, who began recording at the end of the interaction and posted the video to his Twitter account.
Next time, Joseph, take the Nachos.
Watch the video below, and someone please explain why Christie’s pants are so close to his nipples.