Ray Lewis
Photo: Al Bello (Getty Images)

Dancing Ray Lewis, the former Baltimore Ravens great who can’t seem to stop dancing, is now using his relationship with God to decide who does and who doesn’t have a relationship with the Lord.

Shortly after Lewis pleaded guilty to obstruction of justice after being charged with two counts of murder in the 2000 brawl outside an Atlanta nightclub that left Jacinth Baker and Richard Lollar dead, the fearsome linebacker became a preacher of sorts.

Ole drinking and partying Ray Lewis became the new Ray Lewis, a dancing, praying caricature of what he once was. Now, because Dancing Ray believes that he’s got God on his friends-and-family plan, he’s deciding who has lost their way.

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During an appearance Monday on Colin Cowherd’s The Herd, Lewis noted that controversy surrounding New York Giants wide receiver Odell Beckham Jr., including a viral video that showed him near white powder that may have been cocaine and his recent contract demands, is proof the Beckham has blocked God from following his Twitter page.

“Where there’s no God, there’s chaos,” Dancing Ray told Cowherd, Yahoo! Sports reports. “Odell has removed God from his life. This is a kid who grew up under the covenant of who God really is. And everything he’s doing, he’s crying out for help. We have a lot of people reporting about it, but it’s always been the duty of elders to go back to help him. So that’s why I raised my hand. I told him ‘I’m here. Whatever you need.’”

Lewis went on to suggest that Beckham’s problems began after he distanced himself from God’s favorite dancing linebacker, Ray Lewis.

I told him I’m there, whatever you need. … So we started to make those phones calls; we started to have conversation. And then I started to see, he started to distance himself. A little more, a little more and a little more. [...] just listen to me, Colin. I don’t care about religion, I’m talking about a foundation. When your foundation is disturbed, when everything you’re doing is the opposite of what’s got you to this place, then you’re making your own bed hard.

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Dancing Ray then blasted Beckham for spending time with Justin Timberlake—except that Beckham and Timberlake don’t hang out. I’m pretty sure that God’s softest eyelash, Dancing Ray, meant Justin Bieber, but seriously, can you blame him for mixing up these two people?

You show me your crowd, I will show you your future. Man, Justin Timberlake ain’t never played no football. I love Justin, but Justin ain’t getting out there on the ground like that. These guys he’s hanging out with, they’re in studios all night. They don’t have to get up, they don’t have no discipline when it comes to athleticism.

Lewis, a man who, again, was implicated in a 2000 double murder before the charges were dropped, told Cowherd that he was going to give Beckham a hit of the Bible verses to put him back where he needs to be:

First of all, I’m not gonna just gonna call him out, I’m gonna call him. See, a lot of people are calling him out. Disappointed. No, no, no. What I’m disappointed in is we had an agreement, as men. And the difference of me and everybody else, I don’t need nothing or want nothing from you. But when you tell me you want me in your life to help you, when you tell me that we will be accountable with reading our bibles and sharing scriptures and it don’t happen, then you wonder why things around you start to happen.

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At this point, I want Dancing Ray to stop acting like he’s got the answers. He doesn’t. In fact, any professional athlete or other person, for that matter, who hasn’t been arrested in relation to the deaths of two people is doing better than Dancing Ray. But this is the new Ray Lewis, the one who reinvented himself as a black-youth whisperer with God riding shotgun, and his shtick is getting old.

Never forget that Dancing Ray consistently sells out Colin Kaepernick’s protest efforts. Never forget that Lewis locked arms with players and fell to both knees because he was praying, not protesting. Never forget that Lewis gave this WWE-style inspired speech after the death of Freddie Gray while in the custody of Baltimore police.

I’m tired of Dancing Ray Lewis and his faux-preaching bullshit. Beckham hasn’t lost his way with God; in fact, Beckham took the high road, posting this video to his Instagram page shortly after Dancing Ray’s critique of him:

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Beckham is a young man, and more important, he’s a rich young man doing rich-young-man shit; but don’t bring God into this. .... Wait, I’ve got a phone call.

Me: Hello?

God: Steve, what it do?

Me: Ain’t nothing; just chilling and trying to get Trump out of office and writing about Dancing Ray ...

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God: Man, tell that dude to keep my name out his mouth. Don’t get me wrong—I would share an Uber with the guy—but he’s annoying because even I don’t need that much praise. He’s doing it wrong. And what’s with all the dancing?

Me: I dunno, God. I dunno.