I’m sorry, but did someone proclaim this week to be National Dudes Say the Dumbest Things Week and didn’t tell us about it?
The reason I ask is that in addition to da debacle surrounding da rapper who shall not be named, Michael Che is now the latest village idiot to open his mouth and spew nonsense about the one person who’s arguably had one of the toughest weeks of her life: Simone Biles.
Newsweek reports that in a series of since-deleted posts in his Instagram stories, Che distastefully joked that he wanted to “make fun of Simone Biles,” referencing what was presumably New York City’s Comedy Cellar as he shared plans to later go to and “say them into a microphone.” Following the post, Che then proceeded to post screenshots of more derogatory jokes sent to him from various followers, ranking them on a scale of 1 to 10.
The first joke made reference to Larry Nassar, the former USA Women’s gymnastics doctor who was convicted of sexually assaulting hundreds of women and girls— including Biles. “Larry Nassar understands Simone Biles better than anyone. He too had to quit doing what he loved at the pinnacle of his career because of mounting pressure. It’s hack,” the first user wrote. To which Che responded, “Goddamn, that’s rough. Absolutely tasteless. 9/10.”
The next joke came from a woman who caveated her poor “joke” by saying “okay so I am shivering while I type this but you are encouraging me.” (Ignorance begets more ignorance, I suppose.) The joke itself? “Who said black don’t crack?” To which Che commented, “Now that’s a good joke. Economical. Referential. Balanced. 8/10.”
First of all, capitalize the “B” in Black. Second of all, SHUT UP. Thirdly, in what world are jokes about sexual abuse OK?? Instead of, I don’t know, actually being funny—is this what Michael Che’s comedy has been reduced to now? Repugnant jokes about women and sexual assault survivors? (Forgive me if this has always been his schtick; I don’t really pay attention to him like that and now I never will.)
I don’t know who needs to hear this but Black women’s pain, mental or otherwise, should never be your punchline. Ever.
Sadly, I don’t have too much hope that Che truly saw the error of his ways. In another since-deleted post to his Instagram, he posted an explanation of sorts for his disgusting remarks, blaming it all on being hacked.
“Maaaannnn, I got hacked today. Can’t believe they got me,” the post read. “Y’all know I only do jokes about whites and cops. S’all good now, I changed my password and everything. Anyway, y’all hear about DaBaby tho..? That’s crazy. Iight, see y’all at church. Imma get there early.”
Yeah, OK. Cool story, bro, but we don’t buy it. Rather than church, Che might want to take to an actual cellar and just sit there for a while and be quiet until he actually comes up with some material that’s not offensive.
Michael, next time try Jesus, not Simone Biles.