Everyone Is Fine: Trump Says the ‘Caronavirus’ Isn’t as Bad as CDC Reports

Illustration for article titled Everyone Is Fine: Trump Says the ‘Caronavirus’ Isn’t as Bad as CDC Reports
Photo: MANDEL NGAN (Getty Images)

Federal health officials—who are officials of public health, which includes scientists and people who went to school for eight plus years and spent all their time tracking diseases and looking at how to control and prevent them from spreading—have noted that Americans need to prepare themselves for a coronavirus outbreak in the U.S.


Trump—who inherited his money from his father and spends most of his time sleeping in his coffin or biting the heads off of garden snakes and drinking the blood and whose education includes finishing 113th in his typing class—is ignoring the CDC’s warning and instead took to Twitter to tell his legions of followers that this all fake news to try and make the “caronavirus” look as bad as possible.

Seriously, he couldn’t even spell it correctly.

On Wednesday, Trump tweeted that the media is “doing everything possible to make the Caronavirus [sic] look as bad as possible, including panicking markets, if possible. Likewise their incompetent Do Nothing Democrat comrades are all talk, no action. USA in great shape!” NBC News reports.

Trump then announced a 6 p.m. ET press conference to address the issue. Despite the president’s bullshit reassurance that all is fine, he’s still seeking some “$2.5 billion from Congress to fight the deadly infection.”

Below is a live look at Trump inside the White House after the CDC announcement:

Illustration for article titled Everyone Is Fine: Trump Says the ‘Caronavirus’ Isn’t as Bad as CDC Reports

Shockingly, the president is making time to address the nation’s concerns if only to assuage the falling markets. Currently, the president doesn’t have time to deal with a possible pandemic as he’s busy trying to get re-elected.

“Trump spent last week on the West Coast hosting high-priced fundraisers and holding three political rallies — there is little incentive politically for him to echo the growing concerns of the global health community,” NBC News reports.


The belief is that this coronavirus outbreak couldn’t have come at a worse time for the president as his re-election bid is going to be hampered by America being focused on not getting sick, which directly affects economic growth and the stock market, two areas that Trump’s loves to boast about.

NBC News notes that, “Stocks fell sharply Tuesday for a second day in a row and bond yields tumbled on rising concern that the global economy will face a significant blow because of the spreading virus — despite attempts by the president’s top economic adviser to argue otherwise.”


“We have contained this, Larry Kudlow said on CNBC Tuesday. “I won’t say airtight, but pretty close to airtight.”

Health experts disagreed. “This is like trying to control the wind, we will see serious problems here in the United States and no amount of political rhetoric will over-trump the science of what we have here,” Michael Osterholm, director of the Center for Infectious Disease Research and Policy at the University of Minnesota told NBC News.


Senate Minority Leader Charles Schumer (D-N.Y.) was caught making the face people make when they’ve been listening to bullshit that they have a hard time believing. Speaking on the Senate floor Tuesday, Schumer noted that the Trump’s administration doesn’t know WTF they’re doing and have been plagued by “towering and dangerous incompetence.”

“Here in the United States, the Trump administration has been caught flat-footed. The administration has no plan to deal with the coronavirus, no plan and seemingly no urgency to develop one,” Schumer told The Hill.


The Hill notes that Schumer’s comments may have been even more telling considering they came after a closed-door meeting in which the Trump administration briefed the senators on the virus.

“The Trump administration is scrambling to respond. We have a crisis, and the Trump administration is trying to build an airplane while already in mid-flight,” Schumer added.


Sen. Chris Murphy (D-Conn.) also appeared upset after the meeting, noting that the administration’s response to the virus is “frightening” and “will cost lives.”

“Many of us were calling for major emergency funding weeks ago and Trump ignored us. Now it’s likely too little and too late,” he added in a tweet.


But Trump is still tweeting, telling everyone to remain calm while the house is on fire. If only one of his interns could tell him how to spell the damn virus correctly maybe he might get some people to actually believe him.

Senior Editor @ The Root, boxes outside my weight class, when they go low, you go lower.


The Ghost of James Madison's Rage Boner

Mark my words, if the markets keep failing, Trump will be blaming the outbreak on Obama and Pelosi somehow, and Fox will happily let him do it.