Damn, We Miss You! President Obama Releases His Second Wave of Midterm Endorsements

Former president of the United States, current president of Wakanda and founding member of T’Challa University, Barack Obama has released his second wave of Democratic endorsements, more commonly called the “get them the fuck outta here voters guide to success and financial well-being.”

On Monday, around the time that current President HawkSpit von UpChuck was giving arguably one of the most bizarre press conferences ever, a true American hero was announcing his second list of endorsements.

Black America’s current president until further notice noted that these candidates aren’t just running “against something, but for something—to expand opportunity for all of us and to restore dignity, honor and compassion to public service.” (Shout-out proper punctuation. Remember when the president wasn’t just the highest office in the land but it also meant that the person who held the office could spell and not go apeshit with random capitalization and punctuation?)

This is the second time the president has pushed for Democrats running for office in November, as he released a list of 81 candidates on Aug. 1.

Here’s how the Hill breaks down the president’s list.

Among those to get a shoutout in Obama’s latest round of endorsements was Tallahassee Mayor Andrew Gillum, who’s locked in a tight battle for the Florida governor’s mansion, and Ben Jealous, who’s looking to oust Maryland’s Republican Gov. Larry Hogan.

Both Gillum and Jealous would be the first African-American governors in their states’ respective histories if elected in November.

Also on the list was Democratic Senate hopeful Kyrsten Sinema in Arizona, as well as incumbent Sens. Bill Nelson (D-Fla.), Tammy Baldwin (D-Wis.) and Tina Smith (D-Minn.).

Obama also endorsed a number of Democrats in competitive House races, including Jason Crow, who’s looking to oust Rep. Mike Coffman (R-Colo.) in November, and Debbie Mucarsel-Powell, the Democrat running against Rep. Carlos Curbelo (R-Fla.) in his South Florida district.

Notice names missing from this grouping of shoutouts include Rep. Beto O’Rourke (D-TX) who’s in a hotly-contested race against a beloved television favorite —Grandpa Munster aka Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX). You know who else didn’t see his name on the list? Rep. Keith Ellison (D-Minn.), who has denied several allegations of abuse from a former girlfriend. Gov. Andrew Cuomo (D-N.Y.) name was also missing even after he handily beat Miranda from Sex and the City.

As with the first group of endorsements, print this out and take it with you on voting day. President Obama has spoken.

Wakanda forever.