Chad, Evelyn and Blaming the Victim

Mike Colon/LO/Getty Images
Mike Colon/LO/Getty Images

In a piece for Ebony, relationship expert and anti-domestic violence activist Sil Lai Abrams examines some of the most disturbing responses to the latest news surrounding the reality-television couple.

… Another thing that is not surprising, though quite disturbing, is the reaction to the incident that has played out on social media. I couldn't help but to think back to the Tweets and blog posts that said Rihanna deserved to be beaten up by Chris Brown because she, like Evelyn, "don't act right."

A troubling number of responses to ChaVelyn-gate fall into four categories:

1. Illogical: "Chad had a right to head butt Evelyn because they had an open relationship and she shouldn't have confronted him in the first place. Because "normal" people don't get upset nor have the right to question their partner on their infidelity." Um, right. Forgive me for stating the obvious, but it's probably safe to assume that Evelyn got angry at Chad because she didn't realize he was actively exercising his sexual freedom — which was the condition they both agreed upon when defining their relationship. 

2. "Comical:" "This is my chance to show everyone how funny and unconscious I am by making lame jokes about something that is really not funny." See Bill Bellamy's Twitter timeline for a good example of this.

3. Hateful "Chad is the victim because Evelyn has a bad temper, too. Plus, she's a known gold digger who only was in this relationship for the money & attention." 'Cause we all know Chad isn't motivated by either and doesn't have a temper. (Insert side eye.)

4. Nonsensical: "This was something they planned to do so they could boost ratings for their upcoming Vh1 reality show Chad & Evelyn." (Insert multiple side eyes.)


Read Sil Lai Abrams' entire piece at Ebony.

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