Pick any social media platform, and you’ll see a whole barrage of ashy Black men defending Sean “Diddy” Combs. The proceedings have only just begun, and folks are already on social media calling for him to be freed.
The defense is coming from brothas of all stripes, including, Unsurprisingly, Boosie Badazz (formerly known as Lil Boosie…back when he was still making decent music).
Infuriatingly, many Black men are attacking Cassandra “Cassie” Ventura, Diddy’s long time girlfriend, during her explosive testimony this week. Some claim that she went along with the abuse for clout. Others point to the fact that she stayed in a relationship with Combs for years, claiming that this proves she is, at least, complicit. Apparently, none of these fools saw the 15-minute video of Diddy abusing Cassie in a hotel lobby.
Sigh. Okay, Black men…we need to have a conversation.
We could talk about the abundant amount of research that shows how women often times stay in abusive relationships for years. Some end up dying because of these relationships. Others stay for years. Let’s not act like we know what was going on in that relationship nor in Cassie’s mind. So let’s chill with all the assumptions about why she was in that relationship. Now it’s time for a deeper conversation.
In 2017, the hashtag #MeToo was everywhere. It laid bare the fact that women of all races and ethnicities had experienced some kind of sexual assault or sexual harassment. Over 200 men were taken to task for their trash ass behavior, but clearly some Black men did not pay attention.
We should have all learned then to trust women. To listen to what they have to say. And to understand that in some cases it was our doubt about what these women had to say that led to many of them either being silent about the abuse they experienced or remaining in horrific relationships too long.
What the tweets and comments in support of Diddy are showing us is that there are many Black men who have not learned these lessons. They have not learned to listen to women, especially Black women. Instead, too many are going out of their way to defend Sean Combs....a man who had gallons of baby oil stocked in his house and who all but admitted to being abusive.
Do better, Black men. Stop thinking this way. But you certainly need to stop going on social media and putting this raggedy mess out into the world.