Well this was a week. If you’re like me, you spent Tuesday and Thursday attempting to cop a Xbox Series X and/or Playstation 5 to no avail.
I had the damn PS5 in my cart, y’all. It was right there! Leave it to Walmart’s website to completely crash when we needed it most. To mitigate the pain, I wound up grabbing a shirt from the admittedly fire Cactus Jack X Playstation drop. If you like video games and streetwear, you should definitely give it a look.
So anyway, if you’re still stuck in the last-gen like me, or managed to secure the new heat, no worries! We got something for everyone in this week’s list.
Miles Morales makes his arrival to the scene in Spider-Man: Miles Morales. If you didn’t manage to grab the PS5, you’re all good as the game is available on both current and next-gen consoles. Early reviews are solid, with the chief criticism being that it doesn’t change too much up from its 2018 predecessor. Which, considering the price, 10-12 hour length, and the fact it isn’t called Spider-Man 2, isn’t terribly surprising.
Still, I’m excited at the chance to fully step into the shoes of my favorite Spider-Man at a decently budgeted price. PS5 players can spend an extra $20 to cop the ultimate edition which is the only way you can access the remastered port of Spider-Man (2018).
I think this is the first time where we have two new games on the list, and I am not mad at it one bit. If you’re tired of waiting for Cyberpunk 2077 to finally drop, try picking up Ghostrunner to get your dystopian future fix. The game is essentially Mirror’s Edge by way of Neuromancer; you play a cool-ass cyber ninja who does cool-ass platforming while wielding a cool-ass sword. It’s only about 8-12 hours, making it feasibly beatable within a weekend. So if you want to get some of that good good cyberpunk within a reasonable amount of time, I recommend giving this one a look.
No More Heroes and No More Heroes 2: Desperate Struggle were two of my favorite games on the Wii. If Super Mario Galaxy 1&2 didn’t happen, these games would easily take the top spots.
If there was ever a game I would describe as dummy thiccc, it’s No More Heroes. It just appeals to me in a way I can’t even attempt to quantify on an intellectual level.
It’s an anime-ass action title where you use a bootleg lightsaber to body countless waves of enemies as you work to become the number one ranked assassin in the world.
The humor is obscene, the violence is ridiculously over-the-top, and you play as a man whose name is Travis goddamn Touchdown. None of it makes any fucking sense, but slashing bad guys feels so good I don’t even care.
I simply don’t know what else you people want from a game.
Both No More Heroes and its sequel have been remastered for the Switch and are currently available for $17.99. I definitely recommend checking both out in the lead up to No More Heroes III, which looks delightfully bonkers.
So that does it for this week’s list. To those going to battle this weekend to try and cop either a Series X or PS5, godspeed. I’m just gonna be chilling in bed playing No More Heroes. My heart simply can’t take anymore console-related L’s this week.
So as always, please stay safe, wear a mask, wash your hands, and play more video games.