Screenshot: Afropunk

A group of alabastard activists held an #EvilWhiteWomenLivesMatter march in South Carolina after a teacher was filmed standing on a student’s desk, rubbing her feet on him and pulling his dreadlocks as he slept in her classroom.

I will admit that I cannot properly report this story because I have what some would consider the opposite of a foot fetish (if there is such a thing). Not only do I not like feet, but I would rather lick the inside of the rim of an airport toilet than be touched by a white person’s feet. I know it sounds racist, but ... let me get through this story. I’m getting the heebie-jeebies just thinking about pink toes.

On Thursday, residents in Williamston, S.C., peacefully marched to support Lisa Houston, a Palmetto High School teacher who was caught on camera treating a black student like a combination of a rag doll and floor mat, putting her hands and feet on the sleeping student, even lightly kicking him in the face and slapping him as the other children in the classroom laughed at her Caucasian shenanigans.

After the incident went viral on social media, Beckyzilla decided that it was best for her to retire. But people in the community were so outraged, they decided to protest.

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Nah, bruh. Not for the student. They marched so that the district could bring back the teacher!

In one of the most amazing displays of unapologetic whiteness ever witnessed, students and community members marched from the school to the district office in a “prayer walk” (whatever the hell that is) to support Slappy White and to let the world know the positive impact she had on their lives.

Fox Carolina reports that the parent of the child in the video denies any involvement with Houston’s termination, and Ryan Beasley, Houston’s lawyer, says that news outlets released the video with no audio and that the school “sensationalized this whole thing where it could have been defused very easily.”

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And to prove how not racist ol’ Becky the Body Beefcake is (is that reference too old?), she provided an actual photograph of herself and a black student to run along with the story. Not the one she kicked in front of other people, but a different one. But he’s black, so that counts for something, right?

Students are using the hashtags #WeStandForHouston and #WithoutHoustonWeHaveAProblem, and Beasley says that the Tae Bo teacher is “heartbroken” over the incident because, of course, a great teacher like this would take responsibility for her actions.

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When contacted for comment, Kanye West told the woman who thought it was cool to turn a black student into a Raggedy Ann doll for shits and giggles: “Unemployment is a choice.”