President Donald Trump lifts the Easter Bunny’s hand on the Truman Balcony during the 140th annual Easter Egg Roll on the South Lawn of the White House on April 2, 2018, in Washington, D.C.
Photo: Chip Somodevilla (Getty Images)

President Donald Trump is crazier than a shit-house rat. I don’t know what a shit house is or why shit-house rats are crazier than normal rats, but I do know that Trump is even crazier.

On Monday, Trump dyed his body with orange Easter egg paint and greeted the children for the annual Easter Egg Roll on the White House lawn.

Because Trump was speaking to children for less than a few minutes, I’m sure his staff thought, what could go wrong? God bless his staff for not realizing that Trump needs a teleprompter no matter how light the situation.

According to Raw Story, Trump started his speech to children by calling the White House “this house or building or whatever you want to call it because there is no name for it, it is special.” Trump then noted that he and his staff keep the building or whatever you want to call it “in tip-top shape, we call it sometimes tippy-top shape, and it’s a great, great place.”

Because “tippy-top shape” is a nice, natural segue to talking about the military, Trump then changed the topic to funding and noted how the military would soon be “at a level it’s never been before” and said, “You see what’s happening with funding” and “Just think of $700 billion, because that’s what’s going into our military this year.”

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Also, no word on whether or not that is, in fact, former White House press secretary Sean Spicer in the bunny costume.