On Monday, during a press conference with American President Vladimir Putin, Donald Trump kindly escorted the entire U.S. intelligence agency outside to a Helskini highway, where he introduced them to a bus after claiming that he didnβt believe that Russia had anything to do with interfering in the 2016 election despite all claims that it did.
On Tuesday, Trump walked those claims back, noting that he βmisspokeβ when he claimed that he loved Russia and wanted to have Russian babies. What he meant to say was that he likes Russia a lot and that they are headed toward a committed relationship. He also noted that he had βfull faith and support for Americaβs great intelligence agencies.β
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Welp, itβs Wednesday, so you know what that meansβTrump is talking and therefore lying and therefore walking back claims that he and Russia are Facebook official.
According to NPR, during a cabinet meeting Wednesday, Trump was asked whether he believes Russia is still targeting the United States and Trump shook his head βno.β
Trump has not stop talking about Russia because his staff has officially lost their shit and now heβs resorted to using sign language and head nods. Trump reportedly put heart-hands to his chest while mouthing the words, βPutin, do you love me? Are you riding?β
Trumpβs defiant head nod contradicts an earlier warning issued by his own director of national intelligence, Dan Coats, who NPR reports said just last week that βthe warning signs are there. The system is blinking,β and that βtoday, the digital infrastructure that serves this country is literally under attack.β
Trump, who still believes that heβs not in bed with Russia despite wearing pajamas with Putinβs face all over them, added: βThereβs never been a president as tough on Russia as I have been,β which, is total bullshit.
Sarah Huckabee Sanders, aka βSuckabeeβ aka the Devilβs mouthpiece, was doing her masterβs work during Wednesdayβs press briefing, claiming that Trump wasnβt saying no to Russia interfering in the midterm elections but was, in fact, saying no to taking more questions. Why does everything about Russia always have to be explained by someone else who isnβt the president?
Because no one in the White House knows how to use a Motorola flip phone, Trump tweeted, Wednesday, βso many people at the higher ends of intelligenceβ loved his press conference in Helsinki,β adding that he and Putin are probably going to summer in Delaware,βwhich truly bothered many haters who wanted to see a boxing match.β
Just got off the phone with the higher ends of intelligence and they said that they donβt know what the fuck Trump is talking about and they added, βWhose mans is this?β
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