Illustration for article titled Trump Directed Son Eric and Michael Cohen to Keep Stormy Daniels Quiet: Report
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Ever since Trump took office it was always unclear as to what Eric Trump’s role would be. For years he collected unemployment as an out-of-work vampire and technically, he’s only qualified to be a greeter at the White House front entrance. But a new report seems to show Count Trumpula’s official role: Snitch Silencer.


According to the Wall Street Journal, President Trump directed his then personal attorney Michael Cohen to work with the most forgettable Trump child not named Tiffany to keep Stormy Daniels from going public about the reported affair she had with the president. Eric Trump is supposed to be running the Trump Organization along with Trump’s other son, Donald Jr. (aka Not-Ivanka aka Lil’ Big Fredo).

Because the vampire business has been dry for years, Eric isn’t used to working and reportedly contacted a Trump Organization lawyer about how to keep Daniels quiet about the affair that Daddy Trump claims never happened.


During a February phone call, Donald Trump, the official KFC original recipe Grand Poobah (which basically means that he gets to wear the empty chicken bucket on his head during family meetings), was seeking a restraining order against Daniels, the porn actress who spanked the president’s untanned ass with a rolled-up Forbes magazine in 2006. Trump was also looking to enforce the non-disclosure agreement that Daniels signed according to the Journal.

The president reportedly told Cohen he’d “take care of everything,” meaning he’d handle all the costs, the Journal reports. The report not only raises questions about the president’s intentions, which were silencing a porn actress who he didn’t sleep with but paid $130,000 to keep quiet, it also raises questions about the presidency and Trump’s businesses which he’s obviously still a part of.

Here’s how HuffPost breaks down the connection:

An unnamed source with knowledge of the situation told the paper that Eric Trump was acting as the president’s son, rather than as a Trump Organization executive. In March, the company flatly denied participating in any effort to silence Daniels. It claimed that Jill Martin, the Trump Organization lawyer, was involved “in her individual capacity.”

Eric Trump was also reportedly involved in drafting the statement to news outlets asking about the arbitration over the restraining order.


Cohen has since pleaded guilty on eight counts—including a hush money payment to Daniels and former Playboy model Karen McDougal, who also claimed that she had an affair with Trump.

Trump continues to insist he didn’t have an affair with McDougal and added that he likes giving his money to women whom he doesn’t sleep with.

Senior Editor @ The Root, boxes outside my weight class, when they go low, you go lower.

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