Our Trash President Visits North Carolina, Cracks Jokes With Hurricane Victims

President Donald Trump speaks to members of the media prior to a Marine One departure at the South Lawn of the White House September 19, 2018 in Washington, DC. President Trump is traveling to North and South Carolinas to visit the area that was affected by Hurricane Florence.
Photo: Alex Wong (Getty Images)

President Trump continues his fall into the bottomless pit that is his presidency. On Monday, the old man that loves porn stars and chicken (I never thought I could hate any man who loves porn stars and chicken, president or not) visited Hurricane Florence victims on Wednesday.

After learning that a yacht washed up in one homeowner’s yard, Trump turned and asked the man if that was his boat. The man said no.


Trump then replied: “At least you got a nice boat out of the deal.”

Ha! Get it? Because the man didn’t own the yacht that was now in his fucking yard and he does now because of a hurricane that’s left scores of people without power and at least one homeowner with a fucking boat in his yard!


I think during the next election, assuming, of course, that the Russians don’t offer a two-for-one dinner at the Cracker Barrel for those who come out and vote for Trump, that the base requirement for the next person to inhabit the White House should be a minimum amount of empathy and compassion. I mean we’ve had some pretty shitty presidents in the past but none as heartless as this fucking guy who continues to make everything, including tragedy about him.


During a photo op on the same tour in North Carolina, Trump was handing out meals to hurricane victims who’ve not eaten. Nice enough. Even a guy who thinks Puerto Rico is a standalone country named after impoverished ESPN announcer Mike “Poor” Tirico, couldn’t fuck this up.

Trump to PR Team: Hold my KFC!

Trump told the victims of a hurricane to “have a good time”.

Umm, have a good time doing what? Wading in waist-high water hoping not to contract some incurable disease while trying to get to the nearest shelter because their homes have been destroyed?


This isn’t the first time that Trump has wished Hurricane survivors a “good time.” He did the same shit in 2017 when he visited Puerto Rico after Hurricane Maria destroyed part of the island.

I weep for the greatness of America, the people of North Carolina having so much fun as boats park on their front lawns, and the brave immigrants who definitely didn’t die in Mike Tirico’s home country.

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About the author

Stephen A. Crockett Jr.

Senior Editor @ The Root, boxes outside my weight class, when they go low, you go lower.