President Trump wants America to know one thing: He is the most cognitive president to ever cognitive, and when it comes to cognitive functions, he will out cognitive Olympic-level cognitive motherfuckers because when it comes to cognitive shit, heโs acing it.
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On Thursday, Trump told Fox News, aka conservative OnlyFans, that doctors who gave him a cognitive test were taken aback and โvery surprisedโ that he โacedโ it, which is what crazy people say when they are trying to convince others that they arenโt crazy.
In a live phone interview with his personal ball boy (and Iโm not talking about golfing), Fox News host Sean Hannity, Trump bragged about his cognitive exam test score at Walter Reed National Military Medical Center after Hannity asked whether presumptive Democratic nominee Joe Biden had the โmental alertnessโ to be president.
Trump said he didnโt think Biden could punch the cognitive exam in the face the way that he did because he crushed it.
โI actually took one very recently when, you know, the radical left was saying, โIs he all there? Is he all there?โ I proved I was all there, because I aced it,โ Trump told Hannity. โI aced the test. โฆ He should take the same exact test, a very standard test. I took it at Walter Reed Medical Center in front of doctors and they were very surprised. They said, โThatโs an unbelievable thing. Rarely does anyone do what you just did,โ โ the Washington Post reports
The president is doing the same thing I used do when I was a cheater, which is basically embellish the fuck out of all my stories.
From the Post:
Itโs unclear exactly what cognitive test Trump was referring to in the interview. The most recent publicly disclosed cognitive test Trump took at Walter Reed was in January 2018, when the White Houseโs top physician said he got a perfect score. The exam Trump took then was the Montreal Cognitive Assessment, which is designed to detect mild cognitive issues, largely in older people. The 10-minute exam asks patients to identify animals in pictures, draw a clock, and perform basic word-recall exercises.
The White House did not immediately respond to a request for comment clarifying whether Trump has taken another test more recently.
Along with jabs at Biden, Trumpโs latest Hannity interview also covered the Sun Belt coronavirus hotspot, Trumpโs willingness to wear a mask on an upcoming public appearance and the Black Lives Matter street mural in New York that Mayor Bill de Blasio (D) helped paint, which Trump derided.
Trumpโs Hail Mary at holding on to the White House is basically, โIโm sharper than Joe Bidenโ especially after it took Trump two hands to drink a cup of water and having to concentrate bigly just to make it down a ramp.
Trumpโs cognitive test results are another lie that Trump uses to attack Biden and his mental acuity while insisting that heโs not an old racist. Trump wants his followers to believe that heโs intelligent which isnโt difficult considering they are amazed at anyone who can do long division.
โLook, all you gotta do is watch me, and I can hardly wait to compare my cognitive capability to the cognitive capability of the man Iโm running against,โ he said.
Does Trump think theyโre going to be playing Jeopardy or some shit?
Trump, who has politicized wearing a mask to stop the spread of coronavirus, has always taken the presidential position of making fun of Biden for wearing a mask in public, a tune he tried to change on Thursday.
โItโs fine to wear a mask if you feel comfortable,โ he said, and added that he would wear one to visit soldiers and medical staff at Walter Reed in Bethesda.
โI donโt want to spread anything,โ he told Hannity of his decision to wear one at Walter Reed, the Post reports. โAnd a lot of it is you spreading, not them spreading. I donโt want to cause a problem for anybody. I have no problem with masks. But itโs got to be done at the right time.โ
Umm, the right time is anytime your orange ass leaves the White House and if the president was cognitively fit heโd know that.
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