There Appears to Be a Black Man in the ‘Thank You, President Trump’ Ad, and I Have Questions

America’s First Policies  via YouTube screenshot
America’s First Policies via YouTube screenshot

There is an ad—a masturbatory ad—that is one of the weirdest ego strokes of any presidency. It starts with a woman saying “Thank you” to President Donald Trump for basically being the greatest dictator to every dictate. It would be laughable if the video, which I initially thought was satire, wasn’t serious. Watch it below:

The moment of shock and horror comes around the 14-second mark when, based on forensic study of hair kink and nose broadness, there appears to be a black man. I say “appears” because NBC sports announcer Mike Tirico doesn’t believe he’s black, so anything is possible.


If this is, in fact, a black man, then I’m unsure what he’s doing in a video thanking Trump for “making America great again.” I have so many questions.

Who is this man?

Whose mans is this?

Man’s not hot!

I want so many things for this man.

I don’t want this man in this video; even if he’s a paid actor, I want him not to take this job. I want him to go back to when his spine was straight and stand up for something. I want him to be righteous. Doesn’t he realize that they are using him? Doesn’t he know that “making America great” is coded language for slave times?

The video was paid for by a nonprofit called “America First Policies,” which is made up of six of Trump’s former campaign aides to push the tyrant’s agenda.

I want to ask this nigga, “Who hurt you?”

What happened in your life that it got this depressive that you were willing to stand in a video thanking a man who wouldn’t rent an apartment to you, or anyone who looks like you? How badly did the world beat you down until you felt like there was nothing left but to stand in a video for a man who openly roots—and fixes policy—for you and people who look like you to fail?


I blame his friends for this obvious violation of blackness. His friends were supposed to tell him, “Wendell, don’t do this shit.” I don’t know that his name is Wendell, but I don’t know any Wendells, and imagine them all to be black men who would go against their self-interests and stand in a video for Trump thanking him for making hate the language of America.

Do better, Wendell. Before one of your elders sees this shit and really gives you a piece of his mind. I don’t know how many bowls of bland potato salad one would have to ingest to get to this level of self-hatred, and I pray that I never find out.



Another character for my upcoming Netflix show Coonish. He can play crazy uncle Tom.