Before I get into this, let me first start by expressing my extreme sorrow at the fact that I could not superimpose a kufi hat and red laser beam eyes over this entire piece. But alas, the show must go on.
On Monday, Nick Cannon appeared on The Breakfast Club where he chatted with Charlamagne Tha God and DJ Envy about myriad things like ownership, cancel culture and the importance of building and leaving a legacy. The latter topic has proven to be something that seemingly comes naturally to Cannon, seeing as how he fathered four of his seven children within the past year.
Naturally, his persistent procreation came up in the conversation and when pressed by Charlamagne about it, Cannon gave quite the answer:
“Why would people question that? That’s a Eurocentric concept when you think about the ideas of ‘you’re supposed to have this one person for the rest of your life.’ And really that’s just to classify property when you think about it. I mean if we go into that mindset, if we really talking that talk. Like, just the idea that a man should have one woman—we shouldn’t have anything. I have no ownership over this person. If we really talking about how we coexist and how we populate, it’s about what exchange can we create together. So I’ve never really subscribed to that mentality.”
He later added, “I actually think women are blessing us. Those women [the mother of his children] and all women are the ones who open themselves up to say ‘I would like to allow this man in my world and I will birth his child.’ It ain’t my decision. I’m following suit.” To which Charlamagne replied, “I respect that game you runnin’ on them ladies. Wow, Nick.”
And “wow” is right because BOOOOOOYYYYYY IF YOU DON’T GETCHO—I mean umm, wow, what an insightful and interesting train of thought, Nicholas.
OK, yeah, no—no, I don’t mean that.
Cannon’s explanation is literally what you’d get if a hotep and a thesaurus had a love child. Just a few weeks ago it was “I’m having these kids on purpose,” but now “it ain’t my decision?” Which one is it? Or is neither really the case and you just like the doing what you wanna do because you know despite the little bit of criticism you’re getting, nobody is ultimately going to paint you in a certain light because you’re a man and we know how that game goes?
To be honest though, I really couldn’t care less about why Cannon desires to have “10 to 12 kids.” If you want to do that, that’s fine. Just don’t try to paint your reasoning behind it as some faux deep thing when it clearly isn’t. Because not only does it sound like a bunch of game as Charlamagne so aptly put it, it also sounds like something straight out of Oswald Bates’ handbook and sorry to say—T.I. already has that down pat.