trump
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Trump: This Is All Bob Woodward’s Fault
On Wednesday, excerpts from Washington Post associate editor Bob Woodward’s new book, Rage, began popping up online. From those snippets, we learned that President Trump not only knew that the coronavirus was deadly but he was literally told this pandemic would be the worst moment of his presidency by one of his advisers. The president…
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Puck From The Real World and the Rest of Trump’s Possible Supreme Court Picks Should He Get Reelected
We already know that Trump doesn’t know how any of this works. He literally doesn’t understand the workings of the government and claims that he doesn’t have to because he understands his voters, and he might be right. Trump knows that in order to move the needle he’s got to keep presenting what another four…
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Bob Woodward’s New Book Claims Trump Knew COVID-19 Was Deadly and Lied About It
World-renowned journalist Bob Woodward has the distinction of being one of the only journalists (along with Carl Bernstein) who brought down a presidency, so I don’t know why presidents keep talking to him. That would be like Al Capone sitting down with Eliot Ness or the one white Atlanta Housewife sitting down with NeNe Leakes…
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Some Norwegian Man Has Nominated Trump for the 2021 Nobel Peace Prize, and It Totally Makes Sense
2020 has been a dumpster fire of a year. If 2020 were an actress it would be Lisa Raye in that stripper movie. If 2020 were a rapper it would be Magoo or Kreayshawn. If 2020 were an outfit it would be the president of the United States in a kitten heel. So nothing surprises…
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Trump Hired a Fake Barack Obama So He Could Belittle Him, and Other Revelations in Michael Cohen's New Book
It’s pretty well-known that Donald Trump is deeply obsessed with Barack Obama, probably because he is the first Black president and a person who is objectively intelligent and generally well-loved—two things that will never describe the current president. Now Trump’s former right-hand guy and clean-up lawyer Michael Cohen has revealed how deep this fixation runs,…
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Trump Calls Armed American Terrorists Who Stormed Portland ‘Great Patriots,’ Completely Ignores Their Violent Actions
The president of American terrorists is doing that thing in which he celebrates violence against American protesters. On Sunday, the president of people who believe that pajamas are appropriate to wear to Walmart called for federal forces to quell protests in American cities while a group of pickup-driving Trump loyalists, deputized by their whiteness, were…
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Day 4: Satan Slept, and What We’ve Learned Now That the Republican National Convention Has Ended
So what did we learn? We learned that the end is just like the beginning. We learned that the mind can convince itself of anything. We learned that Trumpism doesn’t care about Black life, but we knew that. We learned that there are some Black people who will gain the world (or just white gaze)…
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Trump Wants Biden to Take Drug Test Before First Debate
I don’t think we ever discussed the similarities between President Trump and boxer Floyd Mayweather Jr. Both men are at the top of their game: one a pugilist and the other a racist. Both men have trouble reading big words. Both men have more money than me, and both men have requested that their opponents…
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Satan’s Starting 5 Took the Stage for Day 2 of the Republican National Convention
Day 2 of Satan’s pep rally couldn’t even get started before it was bogged down in controversy. Turns out that one of President Trump’s supporters who was set to speak at racism’s national teleconference, commonly called the Republican National Convention, was axed from the starting lineup on Tuesday after she retweeted some anti-Semitic bullshit with…