news
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Day Care Employees to Parents: ‘Get Off Your Phone’
Day care employees at a Houston child care facility gave parents with cellphones permanently attached to their faces a few words of advice on the proper protocol when it comes to picking up their rugrats: Get off your phone! Apparently, most of the parents seem to be preoccupied with their phone calls when they’re picking…
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Evil Voltron Is Almost Complete as Senate Panel Confirms Jeff Sessions
The movement to form evil Voltron is almost complete as Sen. Jeff Sessions’ (R -Ala.) nomination to become U.S. attorney general was approved by the Senate Judiciary Committee along party lines, 11-9. According to NBC News, the panel put up a good fight, but in the end evil prevailed, as it tends to do with…
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10-Year-Old Texas Boy Invents Device to Stop Deaths of Children in Hot Cars
Bishop Curry V may be young (10 years old, to be precise), but the little kid from Texas has some big ideas. He’s currently working on a device that could help prevent children from dying in hot cars. According to NBC Washington, overall, the number of children who died in hot cars increased across the…
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Beyoncé and Jay Z Are Gonna Have Twins!
Blue Ivy is about to have not one, but two new siblings! You get a baby! You get a baby! Beyoncé announced the upcoming arrival of the Carter twins Wednesday on Instagram. I imagine this photo was taken by Tina Knowles, my second mother in my head. Because we share the same T.J. Maxx and…
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Trump on Black History Month: Where Frederick Douglass At? I See You, Baby!
President Donald Trump was surrounded by all his blacks on Wednesday. That’s right; Omarosa Manigault and Ben Carson were there to hear Trump shout out Frederick Douglass like he was a new artist coming out on Trump Records, during what I believe was supposed to constitute some form of Black History Month appreciation. “Frederick Douglass…
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White House Will No Longer Send Officials on the Air on CNN: Report
The White House is reportedly giving CNN the cold shoulder and will no longer send spokespeople or surrogates on the air with the network, freezing it out from on-air administration voices, Politico reports. “We’re sending surrogates to places where we think it makes sense to promote our agenda,” a White House official told the news…
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Sean ‘Spicy Facts’ Spicer Gets in Heavy Fuss-Fight With the Press
White House press secretary Sean “Spicy Facts” Spicer is so out of his depth, it’s amazing to watch. On Tuesday, Spicy Facts found himself knee-deep in a tense conversation with members of the press corps over a tweet sent out by the tweeter-in-chief. On Monday, President Donald Trump tweeted: I know it’s difficult, but ignore…
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2 Wrongfully Imprisoned NYC Men Open Restaurant, Work to Help Wrongfully Convicted
It’s been a long way home for two New York City men who were wrongfully imprisoned for murders they didn’t commit. However, as CBS News reports, far from being bitter, the men have now become business partners in a new Brooklyn, N.Y., restaurant while working full time to help the wrongfully convicted. According to the…

