Joe Biden
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Trump Wants Biden to Take Drug Test Before First Debate
I don’t think we ever discussed the similarities between President Trump and boxer Floyd Mayweather Jr. Both men are at the top of their game: one a pugilist and the other a racist. Both men have trouble reading big words. Both men have more money than me, and both men have requested that their opponents…
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Politicos Want Biden Out of the Basement. Stay Your Ass Right There, Joe
Apparently some Democrats and Republicans have been making fun of Democratic presidential Joe Biden’s respect for the Chevy Tahoe of airborne diseases, COVID-19. There is a movement of folks who believe that with the election less than three months away, Biden should be traveling around the country and social distancing while air-kissing babies. “I think…
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‘I’m With Joe’: Punch-a-Nazi Poster Child Richard Spencer Tweets His Endorsement of Joe Biden
2020 is officially M. Night Shyamalan’s worst movie. I mean, I thought this shitshow had already jumped the shark when the mistresses of minstrel, Diamond and Silk, decided they were ready to talk about systemic racism, but this infamous year has apparently decided to pull an Evel Knievel over a mile-long row of sharks as the…
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It's Official: Joe Biden Has His Night, The Chicks are Aight, and Julia Louis-Dreyfus Had Twitter Tight
In what can only be called the longest Zoom conference in the history of small box teleconferences, the first-ever virtual Democratic National Convention has come to a close. All of this was supposed to be an in-person event in Milwaukee, but the president fucked up the handling of the coronavirus and here we are. Democrats…
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Don't Tell Nobody But There's a Surprise 'Black Party' for Kamala Harris, and Guess Who's Gonna DJ?
Can y’all keep a secret? Look, I don’t wanna start spreading stuff but I heard through the watermelonvine (which everyone knows, is superior to grapes) that someone whose name rhymes with Joe Biden (I’m terrible at rhyming) is throwing a secret pre-party for a certain California senator, who just became the first Black woman to…
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Black Lives Matter Signs Reportedly Set on Fire in Cleveland
Multiple homeowners in Cleveland, Ohio, have reported their Black Lives matter signs were set on fire. According to Fox 8, three homeowners in the neighborhood of Ohio City reported their signs were set on fire, and other residents reported that their signs supporting presumptive Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden were stolen. Cleveland City Councilman Kerry…
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'It Is What It Is': Michelle Obama Stole the Show, and What to Expect on Day 2 of the Democratic National Convention
We all saw this coming. You can’t put Michelle Obama on a speaking stage and not expect her to come in and shut shit down. It’s what she does. I don’t care if I’m waiting in the wings to speak and I’m literally about to deliver Martin Luther King Jr.’s “I Have a Dream” speech to…