Donald Trump
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The Trump Administration Is About to Ruin Easter
This Beverly Hillbillies administration can’t do anything right. Currently, we are kind of at war with Syria. We still don’t know if Russia hacked the election, except, we totally know that Russia hacked the election. The president is still playing more golf than presidenting, and now it looks like he and his team are about…
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Could Someone Tell Tropicana Jong-il Jr. He Won’t Fare as Well in Politics as His Terrible Father?
Donald Trump Jr. is an asshole. He has the intellectual curiosity of a dead sewer rat, the political sensibilities of a racist Twitter egg and the charm of a spider bite. He comes across as the kind of person Richie Rich punched in eighth grade. The sort of prick who, when hearing “Niggas in Paris”…
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Black Republicans Are Mad at Omarosa, but It’s Not Her Fault They’re Still Foolish Enough to Believe in the GOP
There are many things about Omarosa Manigault that are befuddling. Like, say, why she enters every interview as if she’s Sensational Queen Sherri and everyone else is Miss Elizabeth or Sweet Sapphire. Indeed, very few ordained ministers maneuver like Omarosa, who seemingly resides in a constant state of “Who the fuck want war?” The fact…
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Please Stop Pretending You Have Any Clue Why Trump Bombed Syria, Because His Daft Ass Doesn't Know Either!
Interestingly enough, the most annoying byproduct of the reign of Darth Cheeto and the gaggle of sycophantic Nazi chiltins surrounding him isn’t actually the burgeoning genre of MAGA fanfic trying to explain the unconditional support he still receives from his followers — where writers, essayists, journalists, bloggers, and reporters spend thousands of words examining them when…
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A Conspiracy Theorist’s Guide to the US Attack on Syria
This lying-ass administration will make a conspiracy theorist out of the best of us. Because I don’t believe anything that anyone representing President Vladimir TrumPutin has to say, when word came out that the U.S. had bombed Syria, I was immediately skeptical. Sure, I’d seen the heartbreaking photos of children being killed in a reported…
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US Strikes Syrian Airfield in Response to Chemical Attack Earlier This Week
Cruise missiles reportedly cost $1.59 million each, and your president, who claims we don’t have enough money to fund health care, education or Meals on Wheels, just launched 50 of them at once at a Syrian military airfield Thursday. This is the first direct U.S. assault on the government of President Bashar Assad since Syria’s…
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Rep. Elijah Cummings Dissed the Donald, but Trump Thought It Was a Compliment
Apparently our Creamsicle-colored commander in chief has spent so much time basking in the artificial glow of tanning beds that he can’t even understand when someone is throwing shade at him. In a conversation with the newspaper he calls “the failing New York Times,” Donald Trump boasted that Rep. Elijah Cummings (D-Md.)—who has repeatedly demonstrated…
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Ann Coulter Is Dating Jimmie Walker. Are Your Eyes Burning, Too?
Old people love to tell other people’s business without a single care in the world. And why should they care? They’re old as hell, so there has to be a certain reverence from anyone their junior. Well, if you were raised right, you show respect to the AARP demo, but even if you don’t, they…
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Dear Republicans: Start Snitching
Dear members of the GOP and the Trump administration: Remember when “stop snitching” was a thing? Do you remember how you laughed at its self-destructive stupidity and said it was harmful to our people? Can you recall how you said that anyone who cared about his or her community wouldn’t allow criminals to break the…
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The National Park Service Guy's Face When Getting That Bullshit Check From Trump Is The Blackest Thing That Ever Happened This Week
The face Harpers Ferry National Historical Park superintendent Tyrone Brandyburg made yesterday when presented a $78,333 check from Donald Trump — the same Donald Trump who plans to cut funding from the National Park Service — is a face we all recognize. Because its a face of recognition. It’s the “This nigga…” face. Which is also…