Alan Dershowitz attends Hulu Presents ‘Triumph’s Election Special’ produced by Funny Or Die at NEP Studios on February 3, 2016 in New York City.
Photo: John Lamparski (Getty Images for Hulu)

Alan Dershowitz is a white, Jewish defense attorney who is famous for having served on the OJ Simpson “Dream Team.” Seeing as we all know how white people feel about OJ being acquitted for the murders of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman, you would think that particular part of his personal history would be what would make other rich white people want to distance themselves from him, but you would be wrong.

In an op-ed written for The Hill last week, Dershowitz cried that his rich white friends on Martha’s Vineyard are currently shunning him because he has defended Donald Trump’s “civil liberties.”

“Either you are for Trump or you are against him,” Dershowitz sobbed into his word processing program, “and that is all some people need to know to make judgments about you.”

Dershowitz goes on to say that he knows this to be true because he has experienced it firsthand on Martha’s Vineyard, where his rich white friends are ostracizing him and “trying to ban” him “from their social life on Martha’s Vineyard.”

“One of them, an academic at a distinguished university, has told people that he would not attend any dinner or party to which I was invited,” Dershowitz wrote. “He and others have demanded ‘trigger warnings’ so that they can be assured of having “safe spaces” in which they will not encounter me or my ideas. Others have said they will discontinue contributions to organizations that sponsor my talks.”

Advertisement

Dershowitz likens the treatment he says he is receiving to 1950s era McCarthyism, “when lawyers who represented alleged communists on civil libertarian grounds were shunned. Some of these lawyers and victims of McCarthyism lived on Martha’s Vineyard.”

“I never thought I would see McCarthyism come to Martha’s Vineyard, but I have,” Dershowitz whines. “I wonder if the professor who refuses to listen to anything I have to say also treats his students similarly. Would he listen to a student who actively supported Trump? What about one who simply supported his civil liberties?”

Keep in mind, this is the same Alan Dershowitz who said that a grand jury in Washington, D.C., would be problematic for Donald Trump because of the city’s large black population. He also defended Steve Bannon and claimed to have never witnessed “personal anti-Semitism on the part of Bannon” even though Bannon developed Breitbart into a news site full of white nationalist, anti-Muslim, and anti-Semitic rhetoric.

Advertisement

The same Alan Dershowitz has been hyper-critical of Black Lives Matter, saying the movement focuses too much attention on the unequal treatment of black people while not focusing enough on due process for the white police officers that kill them.

Dear Alan Dershowitz: Please cry m0ar, noob. You are a serious hypocrite.

You are at once whining that people won’t allow you to have an opposing viewpoint while simultaneously saying someone like Maxine Waters—who has encouraged those with viewpoints that oppose those of the current administration to speak out—is “both the symptom and the cause of the divisiveness in this country.”

Advertisement

You don’t get to have it both ways. You cannot at once cry that your friends won’t let you have your opinion while saying Waters and those like her are not allowed to have theirs.

This entire op-ed was disingenuous, the ultimate subtweet and a way of throwing a rock while hiding your hand.

If you have something to say to the rich white people who don’t want to have anything to do with you because you defend Donald Trump, go say it to them.

Advertisement

Do not, however, write a whiney-ass article in which you try to blame those that want to hold the president and his administration accountable for their shenanigans.

You’re really just mad because people don’t want to be around you and your hypocritical views.