R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Last week, I was a guest on NPRโ€™s News and Notes, where the topic of conversation was how to address the President. A few days before that, a guest had repeatedly referred to him as โ€œBarack,โ€ and the show got a bunch of angry e-mails complaining that the guest in questionโ€”black, male, about the same…

Last week, I was a guest on NPRโ€™s News and Notes, where the topic of conversation was how to address the President. A few days before that, a guest had repeatedly referred to him as โ€œBarack,โ€ and the show got a bunch of angry e-mails complaining that the guest in questionโ€”black, male, about the same age with children the same age as the Presidentโ€™sโ€”was being disrespectful.

Video will return here when scrolled back into view
Trump’s Tariffs Might Stick Around. What Should We Buy Now?
Trump’s Tariffs Might Stick Around. What Should We Buy Now?

And News and Notes listeners werenโ€™t the only ones. Iโ€™ve actually gotten requests to blog about it. So here we are.

Okay, Iโ€™m old-fashioned, saditty, hincty, over the topโ€”whatever, but when it comes to addressing the President of the United States, especially this one, itโ€™s my firm belief that we do better when we err on the side of formality.

So once, and I hope, for all: Heโ€™s not your homie. Heโ€™s not brothaman. Heโ€™s not Prez and he shouldnโ€™t be hailed with โ€˜Hey, O, wassup?โ€

Uh-uh. By virtue of his election, heโ€™s been transformed from, as he so memorably put it in his first huge speech in 2004 โ€œthe skinny kid with the big ears and the funny nameโ€ into the Commander in Chief.

If youโ€™re fortunate enough to meet him, give him his props: โ€œHello Mr. Presidentโ€ orโ€œhello, Mr. Obamaโ€ or โ€œHello President Obamaโ€ all work just fine. His intimatesโ€”long-time friends, relatives, neighborsโ€”might call him other things in private, but we ainโ€™t them. (I suppose I should be consistent: we are not they. Better?)

This is a habit we all have to grow into, and face it, weโ€™re only four weeks into the first year of his first term. You can see that heโ€™s gradually shifting from โ€œhow are you guys?โ€ when he walks into the room to a (very) slightly more formal โ€œhowโ€™s everybody?โ€ At a visit to the Dept of Agriculture last week, Michelle Obama referred to her husband as โ€œBarackโ€ initially, but then segued into โ€œthe President and I.โ€ So itโ€™s a learning curve all around.

And it wonโ€™t take very long. As many pundits have noted, the man is looking more Presidential with each passing day. When you refer to yourself with respect, others tend to, too.

Remember this? Rod Steiger rearing up at Sidney Poitier in a memorable scene in In The Heat of the Night: (Steiger) Donโ€™t you push me, boy! (Poitier) They call me MR. Tibbs.

So remember: if we donโ€™t want other folks to call the President out of his name, we shouldnโ€™t, either.

Karen Grigsby Bates is a LA-based correspondent for NPR News and co-author, with Karen Elyse Hudson, of The New Basic Black: Home Training For Modern Times (Doubleday).What do YOU call the President? Write to us at [email protected]. And remember that your e-mail may be published unless you request otherwise.

is a Los Angeles-based correspondent for NPR News and co-author, with Karen Elyse Hudson, of The New Basic Black: Home Training For Modern Times (Doubleday).

Straight From The Root

Sign up for our free daily newsletter.