A black professional woman’s tennis player graciously offered her Canadian counterpart the opportunity to participate in an American ceremony known as “the throwing of hands” after the Caucasian Canuck reportedly exercised a little too much aggression during a post-match handshake.
The fisticuffs began shortly after 20-year-old Canadian Katherine Sebov defeated 18-year-old Alycia Parks in straight sets during the International Tennis Federation’s W60 tournament in Las Vegas. After the match point, Parks threw her racket in disgust and went to the net to shake Sebov’s hand, a traditional show of sportsmanship in the tennis community.
According to Parks, Sebov squeezed her hand a little too tight, which is a traditional show of “I would gauge your interest in some of ‘that smoke’” in the black community. (Unless of course, the person is a board-certified deacon. For some reason, they shake really tight.) The gesture visibly irked Parks, sending her into a mode that is commonly known as: “Aiight, den.”
Apparently, the referee noticed the disrespectful handshake because he was out his chair faster than an airplane passenger trying to intentionally annoy Damon Young (Seriously, what’s up with those premature eject-ulators?)
Parks followed the Maple Leaf-ian and politely tossed a light two-piece appetizer in Sebov’s direction. Because the event happened on the international circuit, Parks even displayed her American hospitality by throwing in a free kick (just in case Sebov is a soccer fan, I guess) while repeatedly telling her Yacubian neighbor from the north to “Squeeze my hand again!”
*Side note: When a black woman is visibly angry and commands you to do something “again,” it is the equivalent of a black man telling you to do something “one mo’ time.” Don’t do it.
Although Sebov did not say if she was scared shitless or suffers from asthma, she clearly does not want that smoke. The referee eventually separated the two, but the most glorious part of the video when Parks’ father flops across the gate and runs to his daughter’s rescue revealing that his last name is definitely not Parker. He implores the referee to forfeit Sebov, to no avail.
Parks later took to Twitter to explain why she was so mad:
24-year-old tennis pro Sachia Vickery, who is also black, backed up Parks’ account, adding that she hopes “they don’t try to spin this.”
Parks, who is originally from Atlanta, is the 410th-ranked woman’s tennis player in the world. A prodigy, her serve was clocked at 119 miles per hour when she was 13. For comparison, when I was 13, I was the 842nd ranked Pong player in the world and my joystick finger was clocked at 93 miles per hour. I, on the other hand, cannot condone Parks’ on-court actions. Perhaps, when she matures, she will learn how to handle these kinds of incidents.
Always take the racket with you, just in case!
These kids never learn.
The ITF is investigating the incident and, of course, the white people are blaming…
Or, perhaps they want some of “that smoke.”
Y’all see what we go through?