Politics
-
Trump Now Wants to Put His Wall on a Layaway Plan
President Trump is becoming desperate, so desperate that he’s now willing to put funding for his border wall on a pay-as-you-go plan. On Thursday, lawmakers shot down two dueling proposals to reopen the government. A Republican-backed proposal sought to have the full $5.7 billion for the wall and a Democrat-sponsored proposal sought to reopen the…
-
Rest in Peace to the Dueling Senate Bills to Reopen the Government, Both of Which Died Quick Deaths
The Senate shot down a GOP- and White House-backed bill that would have given President Trump money for his dumb-ass wall that no one wants and also funded the government. Basically Republicans couldn’t get enough Democrats to back the bill that would have funded the full $5.7 billion needed to run a medieval wall along…
-
I Don't Know How We're Going to Make It Through This Campaign Season Y'all
I’m typically a pretty optimistic person. For instance, I believe the children are our future. I believe in miracles. I even believe in magic. Despite my penchant for seeing a glass half-full, I’m not sure we gon’ make it through this campaign season y’all. When Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. said “I may not get…
-
Trump’s Commerce Secretary, Who's Worth $700 Million, Doesn’t Understand Why Federal Workers Need Food Banks During Shutdown
If you ever needed proof as to how out of touch the Trump administration is with the American people, just look no further than Commerce Secretary Wilbur Ross, who said Thursday that he doesn’t understand why federal workers are turning to food banks during the partial government shutdown. During an interview with CNBC’s Squawk Box,…
-
Well, Whad'Ya Know? One of Trump's Top Lawyers Is a Covington Catholic Graduate
Covington Catholic has been receiving a lot of press lately. There’s been video of a reported Covington Catholic kid chanting “It’s not rape if you enjoy it.” There was another image of a Covington Catholic thug in blackface. And there was the pièce de résistance video of a group of Covington’s finest being complete assholes…
-
Is Kellyanne Conway the White House Snitch?
Books on the White House are becoming the struggle rapper mixtapes from the 1990s or the podcasts of now—everyone has one. But if this newest book is even remotely true, then Kellyanne Conway is the “number one leaker” in President Donald Trump’s White House. Which would be both troubling and amazing. Troubling only because Kellyanne…
-
The Gangsta Rapper President
Now this is a story all about howWhite America got tricked, turned upside downI’d like to take a minute, so sit right thereI’ll tell you why Trump’s a gangsta rapper who stole Ice T’s hair. Ever since Donald Trump became America’s 45th president, I have had a sense of nigga vu about him. Wait. You’ve…
-
Mitch McConnell's Slow and Steady Pace Avoids Run-in with Furloughed Government Employees
Frustrated with Senate Majority Leader and Turtle Club President Emeritus Mitch McConnell, furloughed federal employees gave the Kentucky senator a piece of their mind. McConnell, sensing the commotion from just beyond his heating lamp, wasn’t around to see it. After waiting in vain for McConnell to use his considerable power and influence to end the…
-
Donald Trump Said He Was Going to Give His Little Speech Anyway. Shorter Nancy Pelosi: I Said What I Said
A woman put your “president” in his place today, and he is mad about it. Exactly one week ago, Speaker Nancy Pelosi simply asked the “president” to postpone the State of the Union address until the government reopened. But because Trump has the temperament of a three-year-old who has missed his nap, he threw a…
-
Donald Trump Is the ‘Grand Wizard of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue,’ According to Rep. Hakeem Jeffries
We all have opinions about and creative names for Donald Trump. He leaves himself open to plenty of criticism, so it’s easy to come up with disparaging things to say about him. You simply need to pick a topic like his racism, his lack of intelligence, his troubling policies, the fact that he is a…