Politics
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Prior to His Inauguration, Trump and His Merry Band of Soon-To-Be Convicted Felons Had Over 100 Contacts With Russians
According to a New York Times report that we can all collectively pretend to be shocked and appalled by, President Obstinately Orange and Obtuse just might have a thing for Russia. And by a thing, I mean that during his 2016 presidential campaign and transition, at least 17 of his campaign officials and advisers had contacts—over…
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Trump Bends the Knee to Pelosi, Temporarily Ends Shutdown He Created
The president of people who support the Covington Catholic crew proved that his dealmaking abilities were limited to threats and intimidation and has effectively bent the knee to Nancy Pelosi and agreed to temporarily reopen the government for three weeks as Congress continues to negotiate border security funding. During a speech from the White House…
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Roger Stone Is a Stunt Queen Who Is Loving the Attention From His Arrest
Longtime GOP operative and wearer of custom-made Steve Harvey suits, Roger Stone was arrested early Friday morning. He was charged in special counsel Robert Mueller’s Russia investigation with one count of obstruction, five counts of making false statements, and one count of witness tampering. Stone posted $250,000 bail and walked out of jail like he…
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Roger Stone Has Nixon's Face Tattooed on His Back and Other Things That Might Help Him in Prison
Roger Stone, the informal adviser to President Donald Trump, was arrested Friday morning in his Florida home and charged in special counsel Robert Mueller’s Russia investigation with one count of obstruction, five counts of making false statements, and one count of witness tampering. From Vanity Fair: Stone’s alleged crimes stem from his contacts with WikiLeaks,…
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Trump Now Wants to Put His Wall on a Layaway Plan
President Trump is becoming desperate, so desperate that he’s now willing to put funding for his border wall on a pay-as-you-go plan. On Thursday, lawmakers shot down two dueling proposals to reopen the government. A Republican-backed proposal sought to have the full $5.7 billion for the wall and a Democrat-sponsored proposal sought to reopen the…
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Rest in Peace to the Dueling Senate Bills to Reopen the Government, Both of Which Died Quick Deaths
The Senate shot down a GOP- and White House-backed bill that would have given President Trump money for his dumb-ass wall that no one wants and also funded the government. Basically Republicans couldn’t get enough Democrats to back the bill that would have funded the full $5.7 billion needed to run a medieval wall along…
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I Don't Know How We're Going to Make It Through This Campaign Season Y'all
I’m typically a pretty optimistic person. For instance, I believe the children are our future. I believe in miracles. I even believe in magic. Despite my penchant for seeing a glass half-full, I’m not sure we gon’ make it through this campaign season y’all. When Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. said “I may not get…
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Trump’s Commerce Secretary, Who's Worth $700 Million, Doesn’t Understand Why Federal Workers Need Food Banks During Shutdown
If you ever needed proof as to how out of touch the Trump administration is with the American people, just look no further than Commerce Secretary Wilbur Ross, who said Thursday that he doesn’t understand why federal workers are turning to food banks during the partial government shutdown. During an interview with CNBC’s Squawk Box,…
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Well, Whad'Ya Know? One of Trump's Top Lawyers Is a Covington Catholic Graduate
Covington Catholic has been receiving a lot of press lately. There’s been video of a reported Covington Catholic kid chanting “It’s not rape if you enjoy it.” There was another image of a Covington Catholic thug in blackface. And there was the pièce de résistance video of a group of Covington’s finest being complete assholes…
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Is Kellyanne Conway the White House Snitch?
Books on the White House are becoming the struggle rapper mixtapes from the 1990s or the podcasts of now—everyone has one. But if this newest book is even remotely true, then Kellyanne Conway is the “number one leaker” in President Donald Trump’s White House. Which would be both troubling and amazing. Troubling only because Kellyanne…