OMG! I Love This Song: Rudy Giuliani's Apartment Searched in Federal Investigation

Illustration for article titled OMG! I Love This Song: Rudy Giuliani's Apartment Searched in Federal Investigation
Photo: Chip Somodevilla (Getty Images)

First, a prayer.

Dear sweet 8 pound, 7 ounce baby Jesus, I see you. I see what you’re doing and I like it. Please continue my continuous streak of Ls on the SNKRS app (I know you are thinking about my wallet and not my happiness). Please look into making the McRib a regular offering and please put Rudy’s ass in jail.

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In Daniel Kaluuya’s name, we pray, amen.

Federal investigators ran all up in Rudy Giuliani’s Upper East Side apartment— yes, the Rudy Giuliani that used to be the mayor of New York and former President Trump’s personal lawyer—as part of a criminal investigation into Rudy’s dealings in Ukraine.

According to the New York Times, a few of Rudy’s electronic devices were taken and hopefully one of them was named, “The computer I use to do illegal Ukrainian shit on.”

From the Times:

Executing a search warrant is an extraordinary move for prosecutors to take against a lawyer, let alone a lawyer for a former president, and it marks a major turning point in the long-running investigation into Mr. Giuliani.

The federal authorities have been largely focused on whether Mr. Giuliani illegally lobbied the Trump administration in 2019 on behalf of Ukrainian officials and oligarchs, who at the same time were helping Mr. Giuliani search for dirt on Mr. Trump’s political rivals, including President Biden, who was then a leading candidate for the Democratic presidential nomination.

The United States Attorney’s office in Manhattan and the F.B.I. had for months sought to secure a search warrant for Mr. Giuliani’s phones.

So it turns out that when Trump was in office the Justice Department blocked a warrant into Giuliani’s activities, the New York Times reported. Now that America has put Joe “Maverick” Biden back in the cockpit and Merrick B. Garland (aka The Redo), was confirmed as President Biden’s attorney general, the Justice Department lifted its objection to the search.

Look, we all know that warrants don’t mean that something wrong has happened, but we also know that warrants are usually the beginning to finding evidence of wrongdoing. The Times notes that the the execution of a warrant also proves that the investigation has entered an aggressive phase.

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Also from the Times:

The investigation of Mr. Giuliani grew out of a case against two Soviet-born men who aided his mission in Ukraine to unearth damaging information about Mr. Biden and his son Hunter, who was on the board of a Ukrainian energy company. The prosecutors charged the two men, Lev Parnas and Igor Fruman, with unrelated crimes in late 2019 and a trial is scheduled for October.

While investigating Mr. Giuliani, prosecutors have examined, among other things, his potential business dealings in Ukraine and his role in pushing the Trump administration to oust the American ambassador to Ukraine, which was the subject of testimony at Mr. Trump’s first impeachment trial.

As he was pressuring Ukrainian officials to investigate the Bidens, Mr. Giuliani became fixated on removing the ambassador, Marie L. Yovanovitch, whom he saw as an obstacle to those efforts. At the urging of Mr. Giuliani and other Republicans, Mr. Trump ultimately ousted Ms. Yovanovitch.

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Under the Foreign Agents Registration Act, or FARA, it’s a crime, not only a crime but a crime crime, “to try to influence or lobby the United States government at the request or direction of a foreign official without disclosing it to the Justice Department.”

Sounds like Giuliani had one of those Ukrainian relationships in which they dig up dirt on his opps for bottle service and VIP seating in the White House.

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I don’t care what the results are of the warrant or what has been alleged as long as Giuliani ends up in prison.

You hear me big baby, Jesus?

Senior Editor @ The Root, boxes outside my weight class, when they go low, you go lower.

DISCUSSION

Worst thing that any of Trump, his family of hanger-ons, Giuliani, and any of these other grifters could have done was increase their visibility. If they hadn’t have gone to the White House, no one would have looked at them.

Here’s hoping this is the first crack in the dam that drowns Trump and his worthless family.