If you wanted a reason to stop paying your student loans, North Korea’s got you.
North Korea’s deputy United Nations ambassador, Kim In Ryong, told the General Assembly’s disarmament committee Monday that tensions between North Korea and the U.S. had “reached the touch-and-go point and a nuclear war may break out any moment,” the Washington Post reports.
To which I say: Not before Black Panther comes out, you won’t.
Earlier this year, Kim warned that the entire U.S. mainland is “within our firing range.”
“If the U.S. dares to invade our sacred territory even an inch, it will not escape our severe punishment in any part of the globe,” the North Korean official cautioned.
Kim’s speech Monday comes amid rising tensions between North Korea and the U.S. and harsher U.N.-imposed sanctions on North Korea. The U.S. dotard in chief has been steadily alluding to a showdown, making a veiled remark about “the calm before the storm” after meeting with military leaders and their wives for a dinner earlier this month. Donald Trump later appeared to confirm that North Korea had been on his mind when he made the remark.
The Post also reported that Secretary of State Rex Tillerson, aka the adult in the room, reiterated Sunday that the U.S. would continue to pursue a diplomatic solution with North Korea “until the first bomb drops,” which is a really weird thing to say if you ... don’t actually want a bomb to drop.
But what do I know? I’m just paying bills and minding my own business.
On the same day that Kim warned of an imminent nuclear war, Russian President Vladimir Putin announced that he would cut down its ties with North Korea, falling in line with the stricter sanctions. All of this feels like North Korea is feeling increasingly isolated and, they say, increasingly ready to let its nuclear arsenal loose.
To which I say: Can you just give a girl some notice? Yes, I’m looking at you, North Korea, and your little orange friend. ’Cause I’m going to look really stupid going all in on this year’s Halloween costume if we’re not even going to make it till Thursday, you inconsiderate hos.
Read more at the Washington Post.