Finally, There’s A Speaker of the House. But Here’s Who We Would’ve Nominated to Fill the Void [UPDATED]

Updated 1/7/2023 at 8:50 a.m. ET  

Republicans were hard at work this week, doing their favorite activity: making it impossible to do any governing. For the first time in 100 years, a nominee from the party in power failed to win the initial floor vote. After the 15th try, Kevin McCarthy finally won his bid to become Speaker of the House.

Until they came to an agreement, the House was at a complete standstill. But while the Republicans were spending their time squabbling, over at the Root, we decided to find a solution.

Fun fact, anyone can be elected as Speaker of the House even if they’re not a member of Congress.

So in the interest of helping democracy function and having a few laughs, here are The Root nominees for Speaker of the House.

Queen Bé for Speaker

Obviously we can’t have a conversation about leadership without talking about the queen herself, Beyoncé. Sure, she has zero political experience, but I’d vote for her over McCarthy in a heartbeat.

Megan Thee Stallion

She may not have any track record in politics, but this original Hot Girl, is tough enough for any challenge. She’d be dog walking the entire chamber in no time, and we’d love to see a Speaker who can lay down the law and the beats.

Meghan Markle

The princess of our hearts managed to shake one of the oldest monarchies to its core just by existing. We’re pretty sure she could take on the U.S. Congress without breaking a sweat. And if they try to bully her, well, we know this duchess has Netflix on speed dial.

Common Takes Congress

Not to be crude, but the photo kind of speaks for itself. But seriously, looks aside, Common has been talking about issues in the Black community for decades with eloquence and poise. Congress could certainly use a touch of his soothing wit, even if his nomination would make Fox News explode.

Zendaya

I honestly cannot think of a better Speaker of the House. She’s smart, she’s regal, and I’d do pretty much anything she asked me to do. I’m not entirely sure what her policy goals are, but she seems like a good person (which puts her way ahead in the race).

Kenan Thompson

We heard some clamoring for him in the comments section, and because The Root isn’t The Root without you guys, we decided to add him. Thompson never fails to make us laugh, and politics could seriously use a bit of levity right now.

Serena Williams

If you’ve ever seen Serena Williams body the competition at a tennis match, then you know the members of congress stand no chance against her. She’s fiery, she’s passionate, and honestly that killer serve alone wins her my vote.

Rev. Al Sharpton

This one is a no-brainer. Reverend Al Sharpton has been a civil rights icon since way before I’ve been alive. He loves to talk (so being speaker should be pretty easy). Get this man a gavel cause he’s certainly got our vote.

Keke Palmer

Who can forget the time Keke Palmer absolutely destroyed the central Republican villain of the early 2000s. But seriously, if she can unintentionally destroy Dick Cheney’s ego, imagine what she could do to the rest of the party if she was actually trying. All I’m going to say is that Ms. Keke P absolutely has my vote.

Oprah Winfrey

Has Oprah Winfrey earned some major side-eye from us over the years, sure. (**Cough Cough** Dr. Oz). But no one can deny that Oprah knows how to bring folks together. In a divided Congress, Oprah might be the only person capable of uniting the country.

Shannon Sharpe

This one is just a pure chaos pick. Do I know anything about how Shannon Sharpe will be as a leader? No, but wouldn’t it be wild watching Republicans try to deal with this man on a daily basis, 100 percent.

Ashley Darby

If you know me, you know I had to throw a Real Housewife into the mix. Ashley Darby of Real Housewives of Potomac fame knows how to stir up drama like no other. While that’s probably not a necessary attribute for a Speaker, you have to admit it would make watching C-SPAN much more fun.

Jayson Tatum

Promise we’re not just picking people because they’re handsome. Jayson Tatum happens to be a phenomenal leader of the Boston Celtics, and I think that says something about his ability to lead Congress. And yes, we wouldn’t mind looking at him for the next four years.

Vice President Kamala Harris

Nominating Vice President Kamala Harris for Speaker of the House wouldn’t really make any sense (she’s got her hands full). But you have to admit, having someone competent in the role would be pretty nice.

Former-First Lady Michelle Obama

I mean come-on haven’t we earned seeing Michelle Obama in a leadership position? Mostly, it would really piss of conservatives, and I’m honestly here for that too.

Lou Bega

Mambo No. 5 stole my heart as a child, and now I want to help Lou Bega steal the speaker’s gavel. From what I can tell he hasn’t done a ton since his major hit, so he’s probably free to take over Congress.

Loni Love

If you’ve ever seen Loni Love talk, you know she can command a room (ask anyone who saw her host the Root 100). All we need is to give this talk show host a gavel, and I’m sure she’d solve Congress in a heartbeat.

Representative Hakeem Jeffries

Y’all know I had to throw someone serious onto the list. While Republicans floundered, Democrats unanimously voted to elect Rep. Hakeem Jeffries as House Speaker, making him the first Black politician to lead either party. Jeffries was also the first person since 2007 to unanimously win the support of their party for leadership. Democrats don’t hold the majority, so it’s highly unlikely that Jeffries will be Speaker (although not technically against the rules). But there was no way to make this list without at least giving the New York Representative an honorable mention.