Some Thoughts
-
Sorry, White America, But All Holidays Matter
Today is July 4th, a.k.a Independence Day, a.k.a ID4, according to the seminal 1996 film. A day commemorating when some white dudes won their valiant fight to stop paying taxes to some other group of white dudes. For over 240 years, America has taken to grand fireworks displays, cookouts and a solid run of Will…
-
In Its Efforts to Make Itself a More Inclusive Sport, NASCAR Has Failed Already
Black folks are tired. When we say this among ourselves, the implication is understood. But since we now live in a world rife with brand spanking new “allies,” that phrase likely requires an explanation. Racism is exhausting, which, in turn, means white people are inherently exhausting too. Every single day of our lives, we’re either…
-
'Aunt Jemima Was Canceled' Says Very Sad White Woman Upset About Black Lives Matter and…Pancake Syrup
According to their grammatically-challenged Twitter bio, Turning Point USA is a “Student Movement for Freedom, Free Markets, Limited Government.” While I won’t quite call them Hitler Youth USA, I wouldn’t not call them Hitler Youth USA, either. (But you can call them Hitler Youth USA if you want!) Again, I will not call them Hitler…
-
The Rich Dad Poor Dad Guy Is a Racist, Idiot Trump Supporter So Please STFU About That Shitty Book Forever
People who pray at this altar are specifically susceptible to the sort of symbiotic grift that has made Robert Kiyosaki a rich man.
-
Karen the Kop Kries Kause She Had to Wait in the McDonald's Drive-Thru
Another day, another Karen exhibiting her white privilege and weaponizing her white woman tears to show how the world is so down on and against her…kind. No, but for real. Have y’all seen this? A white female cop recorded herself crying in the McDonald’s parking lot because her order wasn’t ready and they had her…
-
Yes, the Police Are Racist
Why does everyone think the Nazis were racist? Sure, Hitler was definitely racist. He ordered the extermination of the Jews from Germany and later from all over Europe once he became chancellor of Germany. Sure, He built the Third Reich—a political, social and economic regime based on the idea of Aryan supremacy. Sure Nazi soldiers…
-
A Letter to the Shameless Negroes Marching in Suits to 'Change the Narrative'
A screenshot of a news clip is an efficient way to find art for an internet essay when an image from Getty or one of the other subscription-based photo libraries is unavailable. If lucky, you might even find a clip with a synopsizing chyron—which is the roving electronic caption usually at the bottom of a…
-
A Letter Not From a Birmingham Jail
“If it falls your lot to be a street sweeper, sweep streets like Michelangelo painted pictures, sweep streets like Beethoven composed music, sweep streets like Leontyne Price sings before the Metropolitan Opera. Sweep streets like Shakespeare wrote poetry. Sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will have to pause and…
-
The Karenavirus Pandemic: The Diagnosis, Treatment and Causes of KAVID-19
In late 2019, after drinking a farm-fresh, free-range, organic kale smoothie latte from a quaint farmers market in a newly-gentrified section of Brooklyn, Karen Rebecca Kaleighanne Ashley Thompson noticed that she had lost her sense of taste and smell. She sniffed two Gwyneth Paltrow vagina-scented candles to no avail. She tried tasting chicken seasoned with…
-
On the Record: Russell Simmons Finally Faces the Music, But He Shouldn't Be the Only One Listening
I’ve never been sexually abused, but I’ve witnessed firsthand the remarkable amount of courage and resilience it’s taken for On the Record to finally see the light of day. I can also say, with complete honesty, that my actions—or lack thereof in some instances—are exactly why a film of this magnitude faced such tremendous difficulty…