Lessons After Our 1st Year of Marriage


Marriage is no small undertaking, and Mrs. Rocque of Ebony's Lovers Rocque, a couple who write about their relationship, shared what she has learned during their first year of matrimony.

He recently listed 36 lessons he has learned in life on his personal blog, but I've learned a lot from him as well. I won't go as far as 36, but here are five lessons I've learned that I probably wouldn't have applied had anyone else but my husband taught me.

1. The biggest lesson I've learned about myself from Mr. Rocque is that anger is not becoming. I get frustrated and upset easily for reasons that aren't as serious as I make them out to be. This is a fact I've always known, but I didn't work as much as I am now toward making more positive changes. Once I started to see how my negative behavior was affecting the hubby, I realized I needed to get serious about being more positive. Eventually, everyone gets tired of the Debbie Downer, and if I want my relationship to be healthy and work out, I need to make some modifications. I'm not promising I'll always not go off on someone or about something, but I will be better.

2. Patience really is a virtue. I'm amazed by how many things Mr. Rocque seems to take in stride, which is good. Being patient means less stress and less worrying about things that can't be controlled. It's a lesson that people and the universe have tried to teach me all my life, but being a wife and possibly a mother in the future are ideas that have inspired me to be about it.


Read Mrs. Rocque's entire piece at Ebony.

The Root aims to foster and advance conversations about issues relevant to the black Diaspora by presenting a variety of opinions from all perspectives, whether or not those opinions are shared by our editorial staff. 

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