“Insecure” creator Issa Rae has sparked a viral conversation about what it means to be a good friend. During a recent sit down with former first lady Michelle Obama and her brother Craig Robinson on their “IMO” podcast, the actress admitted to being an “inconsiderate friend.” And although she added that she’s trying to change her ways, her confession has lots of people talking about what we should expect from the people in our inner circle.
“I’m very much, ‘When I’m here, it’s all about you,’ but I don’t check in as often as I should with friends. I’ve been told that in the past, and I’ve adjusted,” Rae said on the podcast.
As her words made their rounds on the internet, some criticized her for not holding up her end of the bargain in her relationships.
“Real bonds can’t be maintained by showing up when you want,” someone wrote on X.
Others couldn’t help but remember her “Insecure” co-star Amanda Seales talking about the on-set altercation that led her to stop talking to Rae.
“I had taken so much weirdness for the past five seasons. And it was the last season. And I just said, ‘You know, what I don’t gotta take this no more.’ I don’t know who the f**k you talking to. I don’t know why you’re even addressing me this way,” she said.
But Rae says those who know her know her heart is in the right place. During an interview on the Met Gala blue carpet, she told reporter Nate Vinson that her comments about being “inconsiderate,” which were made in response to a letter from a listener seeking friendship advice from the hosts, were taken out of context.
“First of all, I have a great tribe,” she said. “But I do realize that I’m not as giving as I wanna be, and I have that conversation with my friends all the time, but my friends are understanding.”
A growing number of people online say they understand. TikToker @therealcherryee says she can relate to Rae and how she navigates her friendships. She added that she has a lot going on in her life and sometimes, she just doesn’t want to pick up the phone. But if her real friends need her, she will be there in a heartbeat.
“I don’t have to communicate with you every single day to know that we still have a friendship,” she said. “People that are my friends, they know that I’m down. I’m there in a heartbeat. If I could do it, Imma do it for you.”