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How Sway? RG3 Just Got Signed to the Baltimore Ravens and Colin Kaepernick Still Doesn’t Have a Job?

Illustration for article titled How Sway? RG3 Just Got Signed to the Baltimore Ravens and Colin Kaepernick Still Doesn’t Have a Job?
Photo: Wesley Hitt (Getty Images)

Colin Kaepernick needs to walk into the National Football League’s hearings on whether or not team owners colluded to keep him out of the NFL and present the news that Robert Griffin III has been signed by the Baltimore Ravens to back up 11-year veteran Joe Flacco.


Then Kaepernick should jump onto the conference table and begin counting aloud. When asked what he’s counting, Kaepernick should reply, “All the millions you bitches are going to have to pay me.” Then he should pick his Afro gloriously as he exits the room.

According to USA Today, the team announced Wednesday that Griffin has been signed to a one-year deal.


Seriously, if the argument is purely about football, which many white sports pundits have tried to make it, then someone has to explain to me in football terms how RG3 gets signed before Kaepernick.

Anyone who watches football—anyone who even remotely understands football—knows that hiring a quarterback who can’t stay healthy, can’t throw short passes and stays in the pocket longer than spare pennies isn’t a quarterback; he’s a liability.

This will make RG3’s third attempt at some sort of NFL career after having stints with Washington’s football team and the Cleveland Browns and having sat the whole 2017 year. Oh, he did marry his former side thing, so there’s that.

But when it comes to RG3, we already know how this story ends. It began in 2012 when Washington’s football team went all in to draft him. He had a breakout rookie season that ended with him getting injured. For years, Washington’s football team (I know because I used to be a fan) struggled to try to make RG3 work, but he couldn’t make short passes, he had trouble reading routes, he looked like a Beat Your Feet King in the pocket, and when he wasn’t scrambling, he was sitting back there way too long.


In short, the fragile quarterback who couldn’t throw also couldn’t stay off the injured list. And now this guy, who would probably have a hard time getting a stock job at Safeway if it required him to throw rolls of paper towels to a co-worker, is back in the NFL.

As my uncle used to say, “Something is unclean in these greens.” I think we all knew this even before RG3 was signed.

Senior Editor @ The Root, boxes outside my weight class, when they go low, you go lower.

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You would THINK at this point they would just hire him somewhere to prove they aren’t colluding...goodness. How is he still NOT going to have a job when the hearing happens and they say they aren’t colluding. How? It doesn’t even make normal basic sense. Ridiculous.