Giants Manager Kneels During National Anthem and Trump Is a Crybaby-Ass Snowflake About It

Illustration for article titled Giants Manager Kneels During National Anthem and Trump Is a Crybaby-Ass Snowflake About It
Photo: Isaac Brekken (Getty Images)

You know why Trump supporters refuse to admit that y’all’s president is racist? Because they are him and he is them. On every issue—whether it be abortion rights, gun rights, LGBT rights, religious rights, racist monuments or Black Lives to Matter—the conservative narrative will certainly be echoed by the Lord of the Goya Beans and his little stubby Twitter fingers. So if Trump agrees with literally everything they think about everything, he couldn’t possibly be racist because that would mean they are racist. And, well…


Anyway, surprising to absolutely no one, Cheeto-flavored David Duke still has a problem with athletes kneeling during the national anthem as a show of solidarity with advocates against racial injustice.

The Washington Post reports that San Francisco Giants manager Gabe Kapler, joined by several players and staff members, took a knee during one of the first Major League Baseball games held since the pandemic shut the sports world down.

Orange Juissolini was displeased.

“Looking forward to live sports,” Trump tweeted Tuesday. “But any time I witness a player kneeling during the National Anthem, a sign of great disrespect for our Country and our Flag, the game is over for me!”

It’s been four years since former NFL quarterback Colin Kaepernick started the trend of kneeling during the anthem to protest police brutality in America, and Trump—just like his supporters, Drew Brees and probably Terry Crews (y’all know damn well you wouldn’t be surprised)—is still repeating the bullshit narrative that kneeling during the anthem is disrespectful to the flag.


Listen: The flag is ugly as fuck and the colors clash—that is disrespectful to the flag (and also true). Kneeling in silent protest during the national anthem is not…

You know what? Fuck this. We’ve been explaining this shit for as long as Melania’s husband who she don’t even like has been in office. At this point, if white people are still mad, they can die mad.


Trump—whose skin is ugly as fuck and the colors clash—has been on his anti-kneeling shit for years now. In 2018 he even suggested that NFL players who kneel “shouldn’t be in the country.” (He didn’t come out and directly say “go back to Africa” but, well…)

So Trump is racist and so are his cult-like supporters. So fuck him, fuck what he thinks and fuck when the “game is over” for him—nobody cares.


In fact, here’s a short list of things I care more about than what Conan the Contrarian thinks about kneeling during the anthem:

Taylor Swift cover songs

Celebrity “entanglements”

The contents of software Terms and Conditions

Kanye West’s views on literally everything

Who’s going to take care of Trump’s Toupee after he dies

Zack Linly is a poet, performer, freelance writer, blogger and grown man lover of cartoons



According Orange Toxic Waste Spill 45, Kneeling during the national anthem is way worse than:

  • Sending secret federal agents in unmarked rental vehicles to kidnap protesters in Portland.
  • Knowing about a foreign country putting bounties on American military personnel’s heads and doing nothing about it.
  • Creating a task force to protect shaped metal and stone that celebrates a short-lived “country” that attacked the U.S.
  • Knowing that a global pandemic has already killed almost 150,000 Americans, but still insisting that the country be opened up against the recommendation of professional immunologists.

And this is just the past month. <Sigh!>