Of course, there will be people who will read the title of this piece and immediately be compelled to ask three questions that are only tangentially related to Drake, the subject of said piece:
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Wait, thereโs such a thing as a โlightskinneded thingโ?
What does โlightskinnededโ even mean in this context?
Isnโt that offensive?
(There will also be black people bothered that lightskinneded is given any distinguishing qualitiesโand theyโll say something like, โWHY ARE YOU TRYING TO START DIVISION IN OUR COMMUNITY, DAMON YOUNG?โโand I would advise those people to take a spa day or something. If theyโre in the greater Pittsburgh area, I can even recommend a couple of places.)
The answers to those questions are as follows:
Yes.
It means what it means.
Eh. Maybe.
If youโre still unsure about what a โlightskinneded thingโ is or what it means to act โlightskinneded,โ hereโs a short list of notable and iconic feats of lightskinnededness to add some context:
A) That time when G-Money in New Jack City thought it was a good idea to challenge Nino during the iconic 2 a.m. all-hands-on-deck staff meetingโdespite the fact that Nino was clearly out for blood and ordered everyone to dress in all black and was walking around with a sword and was flanked by, like 17 Rottweilers. Of course, Nino responded with, โSit your five-dollar ass down before I make change,โ but only a thoroughly lightskinneded man would be bold enough (and clueless enough) to think his opinion mattered then.
B) All Knowles family-related forays into retail fashion, most notably the House of Dereon and Ivy Park.
C) Odell Beckham Jr. fighting a kicking net (and losing). (And yes, Odell would appear to be a bit too brown to be lightskinneded, but his hair, his curl pattern, his hotheadedness and his antagonism toward workout equipment makes him DeBarge-adjacent.)
D) Jesus turning water into wine while rocking chancletas and a linen bodysuit.
Anyway, on Tuesday, Deadspin reported that Drake, the worldโs most prominent scion of Activator, the God of lightskinnededness, might possibly have tattoos of both Kevin Durantโs and Steph Curryโs numbers on his left arm:
ESPN editor Jovan Buha noticed something intriguing today: Drake has the numbers 30 and 35, the numbers that Steph Curry and Kevin Durant wear, tattooed on his left arm. The initial photo, taken of Drake playing basketball in a LeBron James high school jersey of all things, was not entirely clear, though the numbers are definitely there.
If this is trueโand thereโs no indication that itโs notโwould this be the most lightskinneded thing anyone has ever done? Iโm not quite sure. There have been too many notable and historical acts of lightskinnededness to even begin to accurately assess them.
I do know, however, that itโs the ultimate testament to Drakeโs pervasive lightskinnededness that the general sentiment when first hearing this news wasnโt disbelief but just, โYeah, that totally sounds like something Drake would do.โ
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