Date Like a Grown Man

Thinkstock Images

Damon Young, writing at Ebony, says that a man can absolutely be too old to date just for the sake of dating.

Black man, aware of large discrepancy between number of "eligible" Black women and "eligible" Black men, uses this to his advantage, beginning a string of ego-boosting and sexually fulfilling pseudo-relationships, because, well, he can. Man continues this process for years, keeping interactions superficial while delicately managing "good guy" persona so women will continue to be interested in him, and eventually …

This story has no ending because, well, its protagonist hasn't conjured one yet. In his mind, there is no tangible end. Sure, things like marriage and children are vague wants, but he's so focused on the present and fulfilling immediate needs that those goals seem meant for another time, another place, and another person. So, he continues to date purposelessly — meeting and sleeping with women while saying things like "I'm not really ready for a relationship," and somehow ignoring the absurdity of those words coming out of the mouth of a 36 year old man — until he looks around at the bar one day and realizes that, while he hasn't become "the old guy at the bar" just yet, he is slowly becoming "the guy who dates women who lie about his age to their friends because she doesn't want them to think you're too old to date her."

In my opinion, the best, most insightful type of comedy has always been satire.

Read Damon Young's entire piece at Ebony.

The Root aims to foster and advance conversations about issues relevant to the black Diaspora by presenting a variety of opinions from all perspectives, whether or not those opinions are shared by our editorial staff. 


Damon Young is the editor-in-chief of He is also a contributing editor at He lives in Pittsburgh and he really likes pancakes. You can reach him at

Share This Story