Cam Newton May Have Written an Inspirational Note on Instagram, but I Can’t Read It Because He Types the Way Lil Yachty Raps

I want to give Cam Newton the benefit of the doubt and assume that his Instagram post, which includes his college mug shot photo, is a treatise about the youth of today learning from their mistakes. I want to assume that the IG post is about the trials that LiAngelo Ball is facing from his reported shoplifting spree in China, and Newton’s arrest for the theft of a laptop during his time at the University of Florida. I want to believe that Newton is sending positive vibes and energy to those coming up behind him, but there is only one problem: I can’t read that shit Newton wrote on the post because he has his Migos lock on.

Seriously, WTF is this?

I mean, there are tildes and dots and dashes and shit all in his text. It looks like Newton went into a time machine and created Instagram, but because he was stuck in 1985, he could only post using a Commodore 64 keyboard connected to a 13-inch black-and-white television that only got local channels. If someone can decode this foolishness, please leave it in the comments below because looking at his chicken-scratch font is making me violent.

Stephen A. Crockett Jr.

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Senior Editor @ The Root, boxes outside my weight class, when they go low, you go lower.

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DISCUSSION

outofstep

11/21/17 4:27PM

i contemplated posting this and even reluctant about it but as i think about my life and the MANY things im THANKFUL for; i want to be an OPEN book so people can here my testimony and learn from the FLAWs and mistakes i MADE on this day 11/21/2008 i was arrested for a stolen LAPtop and im sure your asking yourself where is he going with this story but the moral of the story is this.... on this date i THOUGHT my life and my career was OVER and the fact that i had shamed my family with the media coverage surrounding this situation i vowed to myself no this day (9yrs ago) that “i will BE BETTER from this situation” what you must learn from this story is this; if you live your life listening to what OTHER people are saying what you should do AND NOT YOUR OWN; shame on YOU! i can honestly say to you today that NOone gave me a chance to succeed down bad in my situation and if i would have listened to those people that said i CANT, WHO KNOWs where i would be today. so im EXTREMELY THANKFUL FOR GODs mercy, grace, and FAVOR over my LIFE; so if i can do it with my circumstances surely you can do it and BE WHATEVER YOU WANT TO BE with HARD WORK and PERSISTENCE -LOVE side NOTE: and people wonder why i play the game the way i do, act the way i act, dress the way i dress, and even LIVE the way i LIVE because in some peoples eyes “im not supposed to be here” but in my eyes im not going to have ANY regrets with the second chance GOD has given me “(ball so hard) im shocked too IM SUPPOSED TO BE LOOKED UP TOO if you escaped what I’ve escaped YOUD BE IN PARIS GETTING MESSED UP TOO -JAYz

I’m not doing the hashtags. I might kill myself... What a goddamn fucking mess.