But aside from the music, the battle would be pretty intense. For instance, pipe organists at white churches don’t seem to be prepared with a selection of shouting music when the Holy Ghost comes. And have you noticed that white churches have better air conditioning? It’s always a balmy 69 degrees in places where white people worship. Even though I have no idea what it means, I’ve been told a million times that “black people draw heat.” I think it’s a conspiracy between the church fan industry and the funeral home lobbyists.


Or maybe the Holy Ghost can only come when the temperature is above 86 degrees.

Tiebreaker: The Lord working in mysterious ways, His wonders to perform vs. Him being good all the time and all the time, Him being good.


1. A Plate at “The Cookout” vs. A Seat at “The Table”

This is the hardest one of all.

Would you rather have an invitation to the proverbial cookout or a seat at the infamous “table?”


Before you make your decision, there are a few things you must consider: