Ben Carson Doesn’t Want You to Get Reparations and Other Embarrassingly Ignorant Things

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When my children are older I will tell them that this was Dr. Ben Carson:

Dr. Ben Carson
Dr. Ben Carson
Photo: YouTube

I will explain to them that he was the one of the world’s leading neurosurgeons who sadly lost his life in a tragic hang gliding incident off the coast of Honduras, because I want to keep the legacy of Ben Carson without the actual embarrassment that is Ben Carson.

Make no mistake about it: Ben Carson is a goddamn embarrassment. At this point, I would trade Ben Carson and a 2022 draft pick for the rights to Pauly Shore. I would bet against Ben Carson in a game of Jeopardy, even if all of the categories were neurosurgery-related. If my life hung in the balance and the only doctors on call were Ben Carson and Doc McStuffins, I would raise up just enough from my deathbed to say “Send in the Stuffins!”

I’m not the only one who doesn’t think Ben Carson has lost it. Never forget that in a room full of dunces, Ben Carson, a former world-renowned neurosurgeon, was relegated to being the doctor of housing and urban development because Black.

So why do any of us even care what Ben Carson has to say? Well, because it’s fun and because this guy used to be a GODDAMN NEUROSURGEON!

In an op-ed for the Washington Post written by Uncle Ben Carson, Sunday, the good doctor argues that America needs to stop trying to correct racial equity with reparations and ‘anti-poverty’ stipends because it hurts white people’s feelings.

“Proponents of equity see no problem with treating groups of people differently based solely on race, as long as it serves their agenda,” Carson wrote Sunday. ‘This is what we used to call racism, and those not blinded by identity politics still recognize it as such.’


Carson pointed to actual Black people who aren’t ashamed of their Blackness, like House Judiciary Committee Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee and her bill to study reparations for descendants of slaves. He also pointed to Oakland, Calif., where the mayor has moved to give anti-poverty stipends to residents who are ‘BIPOC’—that is, Black, indigenous or people of color.

Oakland’s Mayor Libby Schaaf is using a privately funded program to give low-income families of color a $500 a month stipend to be spent as they see fit.


‘That program explicitly excludes poor white families,’ Carson argued.

Last week, the House moved a step closer to providing reparations to the descendants of slaves who provided free labor that helped build this country by agreeing to study what reparations would look like.


This could affect some 40 million Black folks who could receive some payment, but that is a pipe dream at this point, as the bill may never see the House floor and would get fly-swatted to the ground by the Senate.

But because Ben Carson is continuing to do all of the work he’s done in the first half of his life, he couldn’t help but be the lone Black voice to say, “Those niggas don’t deserve shit.”


Carson argued: “Those alive today are not culpable for misconduct that took place long before they were born,” adding “it would be unjust to hold them responsible for it.”

I wish Ben Carson would’ve just been a gymnast so that all of the backflips he’s willing to do for white approval would be justified. At this point, his willingness to be the lone Black voice declaring how no one should pay for systemic racism is tiring.


Makes Me Wonder Why I Even Bring The Thunder

It seems to me that arguments against equity are not serious, unless someone is literally looking the leopards in the eyes and telling them that there is no such thing as an emergency facial reconstruction.