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Trump Won’t Open Obamacare Enrollment in a Pandemic Because He Hates Obama That Much
Trump has to have an enemy. For the longest time, it was the banks; then it was the media, then it was Obama, then the media again and back to Obama. Trump hates Obama so much that he’s willing to keep Obamacare exchanges closed so that uninsured Americans can’t purchase health care coverage IN A…
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Obama Is Getting Tired of Trump’s Cheetos-Dusted Fingers Staining His Legacy
A man can only take so much. Former President Barack Obama has been silently watching as the man racist white people voted into office works tirelessly to destroy the country. He’s been busy loving his wife and enjoying his time away from the spotlight as the evil orange Russian operative continues to tear away at…
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The President Finally Got the Seriousness of Coronavirus After Seeing New York Morgue Truck on TV
Everything is fucked. All of us are on house arrest. There is never enough strawberry cream cheese to make it through these trying times. (Seriously, who is buying all the fucking strawberry cream cheese?) And the President of the United States is so fucking slow that despite coronavirus ravaging the globe, it took him seeing…
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Can Mitch McConnell Social Distance From America? Now He’s Blaming Trump’s Ham-Handed Coronavirus Response on Impeachment
Kentucky Senator Mitch McConnell is proof that the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are real; it’s just that no one is willing to go down into the sewer to find out. Because he’s a slimy-sewer dweller, McConnell is now blaming Trump’s horrid response to the coronavirus on none other than Democrats and their push to impeach…
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Remember the Coronavirus Website Trump Talked About? Turns Out a Jared Kushner-Related Firm Was Building It
Remember the March 13 press briefing where President Donald Trump berated PBS NewsHour reporter Yamiche Alcindor? Not the one where he said “you people”; the other one, the first time, when he called her question “nasty”? Well, during that briefing, he hailed this beautiful website that was going to be able to ask users about…
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Trump Continues to Weaponize the Coronavirus and Admits That Easy Voting Hurts Republicans
On Monday, President COVID-45 (Billy Dee Williams voice) admitted that easy voting hurts Republicans even though he’s totally not a Republican but plays one on TV. During an interview with a bunch of white people on Fox & Friends, Trump claimed that Democrats added more funding to the coronavirus stimulus package to make voting easier,…
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Trump Sent Nearly 17.8 Tons of Medical Supplies to China After First Coronavirus Case in the U.S. When Shortages Hit, He Blamed Obama
President Donald Trump was fully aware that on Jan. 21, the coronavirus had hit the United States, the land he’s been elected (by Russian oligarchs) to govern. He may have also known of the disease’s devastation as early as December but on Jan. 21, a 30-year-old Washington state man who had visited Wuhan, China had…
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It’s Time for America to Do the Right Thing and Quarantine Trump’s Press Conferences
On Sunday, the president of people who didn’t wash their hands before the coronavirus and probably still don’t held a rally disguised as a press conference in which he rated questions on a scale of nice and ugly, berated a reporter for quoting him and continued to lie to the American public about what he…
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The Trump Administration Just Canceled an Order for 80,000 Ventilators to Haggle Over the Price
If there is a woman in your neighborhood who has ventilators, you might as well go on and get you one to bring to the hospital in case of an emergency because if you are waiting for the president of the United States or his bumbling band of yes-men disguised as an administration to save…
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Trump’s Doing It Again. And by ‘It’ I Mean Lying During a Global Pandemic
There are some things that have remained consistent since the coronavirus hit: Jeezy is still rapping about drugs despite being a grown-ass man in a serious grown-ass man relationship with the Asian girl from The Real or The Talk or The View. Florida Rep. Matt Gaetz has continued to unite the world with his idiocy,…


